Assumptions and Expectations
by shepsgirl72
Summary: From behind him a guttural growl rolled out, the emptiness of their barred cells only emphasising the threatening sound. Sheppard froze and Rodney's jittering and complaining instantly stopped, his eyes widening at the sound. 'I'll figure something out...I promise.' When meeting an advanced race of aliens the team discover things are not always what they seem...the hard way.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Okay, so this one isn't the next story I promised to post, but the idea came to me and I couldn't put it to rest until I wrote it. It's a short one for me, just three chapters long, and inspired by my hitting a certain birthday today, which might involve a '4' and have a '0' in there somewhere too. If I'm turning 40, I'm taking someone else down with me. Since I did the honours for Sheppard last year it's Rodney's turn this year, and because they're in the Pegasus Galaxy, it's far from a normal birthday. Set in Season 5.**

**This is kind of a companion piece for 'Another Pegasus Birthday', but stands alone in its own right. Team whump ensues, but as with all my stories, Sheppard is the focus. Unbeta'd due to writing this in a rush ready to post my big day. Enjoy - warts 'n all! :) **

**Disclaimer: As I'm sure you're all aware, Stargate Atlantis does not belong to me, because if it did it would still be on our screens! Rant over... **

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Assumptions and Expectations**

**Chapter 1**

'I'm not asking her for help. She's just a kid,' McKay pouted, arms tightly folded over his chest and his chin jutted at an angle that suggested his mind could not be changed.

'A very smart kid,' Sheppard pointed out, grasping the bars that connected their two cells. For the first time he was glad the barrier was between them, because right now he could willingly strangle his friend for not listening to him when their situation was so dire.

'I don't work with kids...I don't even like them!'

Though furious, Sheppard put himself in Rodney's shoes and tried to understand the man's near phobia of children. He knew how McKay felt about kids, knew it better than he cared to admit right now, but this youngster was different and the scientist actually felt threatened by her intelligence. If there was ever a kid McKay could relate to, she was the one, but he just wouldn't contemplate asking her for assistance because it would mean admitting she was smarter than him. 'I understand that, Rodney. I really do, but we're running out of time here. Can't you make an exception?' he begged, choosing not to call McKay on the truth of his refusal.

From behind him a guttural growl rolled out, the emptiness of their barred cells only emphasising the threatening sound. Sheppard froze and Rodney's jittering and complaining instantly stopped, his eyes widening at the sound. 'I'll figure something out...I promise.'

Sheppard knew he shouldn't doubt McKay since he'd rarely failed to pull off a miracle when it was needed, but those few failures – those incidents that ended in total calamity because of Rodney's complete inability to accept he was wrong – left him scared to put this situation entirely in the scientist's hands.

'Maebus is the only one we've met so far on this God-forsaken ship who's shown even the slightest hint of compassion for us. We need her on our side, Rodney,' he reiterated, leaving his gaze burning into McKay's far longer than he would normally be comfortable with to get his point across.

'But she's a kid!'

Sheppard dropped his head against the bars and sighed. This conversation had been going around in circles for who-knew-how-long now, and it wasn't showing any signs of taking a useful detour. For a second, his brain fazed out, scrolling through calculations and estimations of how best to launch an escape bid, but the equations and risk evaluations were gone before he could mentally grasp them. He sighed, half wanting the changes he felt happening to take hold, and half dreading them. They'd been held like this for three weeks now, and he saw no signs of the Pendorans tiring of their work. They had to find a way out of this.

They'd foolishly thought they'd struck gold after stumbling across the advanced civilisation travelling at the outskirts of the Pegasus Galaxy. The Pendorans, a race of long-limbed, long-haired albinos, were in possession of technologies that had exceeded all of their expectations. Rodney in particular had almost burst with excitement when they'd turned out to be a friendly society apparently willing to share their knowledge, not least because their ship was capable of reaching sub-light speeds far greater than anything the Daedalus could obtain. Sheppard had been kicking himself ever since for not realising it was all too good to be true. Things like that just didn't happen in the Pegasus Galaxy...not without a massive price to pay.

'Rodney...please...'

Before he could finish his appeal the lighting dulled and the outer door to their cell room pulled back into one of the all-encompassing, oppressive black walls as a group of figures moved in from the poorly lit corridor outside. This had become a regular scene over their past three weeks of incarceration in that bleak room, one that Sheppard had now come to associate with procedures and pain. He stood his ground and waited to see what would happen this time. Sometimes these 'people' simply came to observe the results of their work, and he silently prayed this was one of those times.

Unfortunately, it wasn't. The group approached Rodney's cage and unlocked it, two of them stepping inside and grasping his upper arms to drag him out into the open.

'Oh, no...not again!'

'Stay strong, Rodney,' Sheppard called after him. He didn't ask the Pendorans to take him instead because he knew it was futile. For the first few days he'd shouted himself hoarse trying to protect McKay and Teyla and draw the Pendorans' attentions onto him, not to mention demanding to know Ronon's whereabouts, but it had all fallen on deaf ears. They simply didn't consider him important enough to listen to.

Another growl from the shadowy end of his cage made him slide his way into the furthest corner from it. Keeping his distance was the best tactic now, something he'd learned the hard way. The deep scratches down the left side of his face and neck stung at the memory of his last attempt to appeal to some deeply rooted sense of loyalty in the creature. It was hard to accept there was nothing left to reason with, but the truth was gouged into his skin. His cage-mate was little more than an animal now.

The sound of the bars creaking sent shivers down his spine. The monster was tethered to them to keep it restrained, but it grew stronger with each passing hour and some time, maybe some time soon, either the tethers or the bars were going to give up.

Drawing his legs up to his chest, he wrapped his arms around them and laid his head on his knees. All his instincts told him he should stay awake, keep watch against the imminent attack, but it had been so many days since he'd had anything near proper sleep he had no choice any more. He was changing too, more than he was happy to admit even to himself, and the physical and mental effects made finding peace almost impossible. His senses were now bombarded with so much information his brain was frying just trying to figure it all out. Being awake was exhausting. He had to rest while the lights were low and less intrusive.

As he drifted, his mind replayed the details of the meeting with their captors, the seemingly beneficent aliens who had so warmly welcomed them on board their ship before imprisoning them. The Pendorans had possessed and air of serenity despite their size. He supposed that was why they'd been so easily lulled into trusting them. These were clearly a peaceful race, happy in their pursuit of knowledge and untainted by the desire for greater wealth and status. They had seemed ideal allies...until the time had come for them to leave the ship and return to Atlantis.

Ronon had been the first to fall in the attack, the Pendorans obviously recognising the physical threat he posed and shooting him several times with darts of sedatives that crumpled his legs beneath him in seconds, despite his best attempts to stay upright and reach for his weapon. After that, the rest of them had been easily overwhelmed by the sheer numbers of their captors, tranquilised before any of them could react in defence of themselves.

When they'd woken some time later there had been no sign of Ronon. The Pendorans had given no explanation of his whereabouts, only saying that he was gone because he was of no interest to them, and that the three of them still remaining would further their understanding of the human species and its 'wondrous variety'. He hadn't understood what they'd meant then, but he knew only too well now.

A hiss from the shadows made him start and wake, the creaking of the bars setting his teeth on edge. 'Come on, Teyla. Gimme a break, would ya?'

Teyla hissed again, pulling forward against her bonds until her face came into the light. The once beautiful Athosian now sported a waxen complexion, and a set of razor-sharp spiked teeth any piranha would have been proud of. She was barely recognisable as his teammate.

'I care nothing for your condition,' she growled, her bi-tonal voice sending a shudder through him. 'I have hunger I need to satisfy.'

'Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not planning to help you out with that.' He could feel her utter contempt for him filling his mind, making his head ache from trying to shut it out. It had been this way for a few days now. At first he'd thought he was going crazy, hearing the thoughts of McKay and Teyla even when they weren't speaking, but then he'd started hearing the voices of the Pendorans who were examining him too, anyone who came close to him in fact.

'These bonds will not hold me much longer, and then I will take great pleasure in feasting on your defiance.'

He wished he had a dollar for every time he'd heard a Wraith say that to him. Apparently his defiance was considered the dish of the day in Wraith circles. 'Yeah, well...good luck with that,' he grunted, the threat sounding just as hollow as it felt as the words left his lips. He knew if she broke free and chose to feed there wasn't much he could do about it other than fight her with his bare hands. Her ever increasing strength and Wraith agility, of course, meant the match was more uneven than ever, and he rarely won a sparring match against her under even normal circumstances.

The bars creaked again, his sensitive eardrums protesting against the noise by frantically vibrating and causing him to cover his ears. Not that doing so stopped him from hearing the snap that heralded Teyla's first break-though.

'Aw crap!'

With one bond broken, the rest seemed to just give up the fight, and in seconds she was on him, slamming his head into the bars behind him and leaving him stunned as she tore at his shirt and rammed her hand against his breast bone. Although her fingertips dug into his flesh, and her feeding sucker latched on, nothing else happened. The rush of relief that gave him was almost as much of a high as the Wraith enzyme that had flooded his system when Todd had fed on him in Kolya's warehouse. She couldn't feed. She wasn't ready yet.

Teyla screamed a cry of sheer frustration, pulling back her useless hand and staring at it as if it had committed some heinous violation of her rights. It seemed she would go hungry again today. Her transformation wasn't quite complete, although he could see it wouldn't be long before it was. Teyla dropped the ineffectual feeding hand down onto the floor beside his head and lowered her face down to his, sniffing his scent as if savouring the aroma of a finely cooked meal. 'You win today, Sheppard. But very soon your life-force will be mine for the taking and I will revel in the taste of your defeat, Lantean.'

He held very still, not even flinching as a string of saliva dripped from her savage maw down onto his cheek. Her actions were driven by an ancient rivalry long since died out, but here their captors had awakened it once again. None of this was her fault. He had no wish to aggravate or hurt her if it could be avoided.

The Pendorans had apparently been doing far more than entertaining Sheppard and his team while inviting them to enjoy their hospitality. Somehow, they had all been scanned, assessed and evaluated during their time in their company, and his DNA and that of Teyla had been too tantalising an experiment to resist. So they had taken them prisoner and proceeded to put them through a series of experiments designed to agitate the more dormant aspect of their special genetics and cause it too mutate and take over. As the days had slipped by, Teyla had first gradually lost her normal composure then her physique had begun to change, her body and limbs elongating with painful spasms that had had her writhing on the floor with nothing he could do to help her. He'd never felt so useless or guilty. Teyla was a mother now with a young son waiting for her return, and she was becoming a monster before his eyes. He should have taken better care of her.

The experiments carried out on him had been far less stressful on his body. But he could feel the changes even if he couldn't see them, even here, pinned to the floor beneath his snarling, drooling companion. His mind was filled with her hatred of him and what he was becoming, her desire to feed and her desperation to break free and leave this torturous prison to the point it felt as if his brain would explode. Then, as she drew her hand back to slash him again with her talon-like finger nails, he mentally cried out, _No! _

Teyla's arm halted and refused to move, frozen in mid-swing.

He saw the suddenly confusion overtake Teyla's hatred of him, saw her battle to bring that hand forward, but she couldn't. He was controlling her actions. It seemed he'd changed far more than even he had realised.

The doors drew back again and several sets of footsteps hurried in. He sensed the Pendorans' surprise that she'd broken free of her bonds, but they quickly recovered and the familiar sound of tranquiliser guns rang out. Teyla arched back off him, screaming in protest as a number of darts hit her in the back, but even her Wraith strength wasn't enough against their sedatives. Seconds later she slumped forward onto him, a dead-weight.

For a brief moment Sheppard worried the Pendorans had noticed Teyla's inability to move, but they made no comment, and it seemed he had once again kept his burgeoning abilities hidden. They'd taken his weapons and his freedom, the only way he could arm himself was to use what they were awakening within him against them, and to do that he had to keep it from them until the time was right.

The Pendorans entered the cage and dragged her off him, and as he pushed up he saw them restraining her again, this time with chains rather than the earlier leather-like straps.

Then, en masse, they turned toward Sheppard. 'Bring him to the laboratory to begin the next stage of his treatment,' one ordered, as the others advanced on him.

The dart that hit him in the thigh ended any thoughts he had of complaining.

oooOOOooo

Rodney carried out the tests set for him to the best of his ability, all the time conscious that his every movement and decision was being monitored. The Pendorans were keen to study his methods of calculation and had spent more hours than he cared to...well, calculate...testing his metal agility.

At first he hadn't minded. The computer screens had brought welcome illumination to the otherwise dark and foreboding lab, and the tests had been easy, relatively speaking. Not that Teyla or Colonel 'Coulda been Mensa' would have got anywhere with them, but for him it had been a cakewalk. Then the tests had grown progressively more complex, pushing his knowledge of topics such as quantum mechanics and thermodynamics to its very limits...and to add insult to injury he was punished with electric shocks whenever he made a mistake, as if the embarrassment of making errors wasn't bad enough. His hands and arms now constantly tingled with pain, even when he wasn't being tested, and all the time that kid sat watching him, doing nothing to ease his discomfort. But at least it was just the computer tests this time. Sometimes they made him lie inside a dark and claustrophobic metal chamber for hours on end while it felt like they sucked out his brains. That process always left him exhausted and nauseous for at least the next day. In comparison, this was far more bearable.

The current test question had been on the screen for a few minutes now, and Rodney had learned the painful truth that running on ego wasn't the wisest move. Since that was his natural default setting it had been difficult to rein it in, but now he second-guessed himself on everything, his self-confidence all but destroyed.

Just when he thought he had this latest problem sorted in his mind, his hand spasmed and he hit the wrong key, getting an instant shock for his troubles. McKay hissed, grasping his throbbing hand under his left arm and doing his utmost not to curse. The Pendorans didn't like cursing. They thought it was uncivilised and a sign of an 'underdeveloped vocabulary symptomatic of less advanced civilisations', their words, not his. So now he didn't curse, because he was determined not to be considered inferior. Except they thought he was inferior anyway – why else would they be treating him like a trained chimp?

The kid, Mavis or whatever the hell she'd said her name was, winced at his obvious pain. 'Take your time, Dr McKay, and when you're ready, please try again.'

She wasn't actually a kid per se, more a teenager, but in McKay's book, anyone under twenty years of age was strictly outside of his comfort zone. He just didn't know how to relate to them. But at least she used his name...it was more than the others ever did.

'You know, I respond just as well to food incentives!' he squeaked, shaking out his painfully numb digits.

The young girl looked mortified, then instantly instructed one of her companions to bring their subject some food. He could have done without being referred to as a subject, but the thought of food took the edge off his annoyance.

He was soon presented with a plate of sustenance that was about as appealing as elephant dung to look at, but thankfully smelled and tasted far better. The Pendorans had analysed their digestive systems on their initial incarceration and had calculated that this mush was the most nutritious form of meal the humans could eat. This had been their only food for the past three weeks and even though he'd found the texture of it almost unpalatable for the first couple of days, in time he'd grown used to it. When it was a choice between eating gloop and hypoglycaemia, it was an easy adjustment to make.

Unappetising as the colour and consistency were, Rodney wolfed the meal down as if he hadn't been fed in days, feeling no shame in the way it trickled down his chin and dripped back into the bowl in his haste to feel full and calm again. This situation was playing havoc with his already highly-strung nerves. Eating was the only 'normal' thing he did now, and while he focused on keeping the slimy mess down he wasn't thinking about how hard it would be for Atlantis to ever locate them on a ship as fast as this.

All the time the girl, the strangely elongated albino child of this brilliant, if apparently inbred, race of humanoids, watched him as if he was some fascinating sample she'd cultivated in a Petri dish.

'You seem angry, Dr McKay. Why is that?' she asked as he finished up his meal.

Rodney almost balked on his last mouthful of goo, not sure he was brave enough to say how he felt. But weeks of captivity and low-grade torture had loosened his tongue and made him forget his normal inhibitions when facing the enemy. He was no Sheppard, he couldn't charm his way out of a tricky situation like his friend could, but he could definitely hurl insults as well as the next man...probably better. And since it was growing ever likely that he was going to spend his impending fortieth birthday being bested by a super smart kid, he was feeling mean enough to do it.

'Yeah, I'm angry. You people...you...you claim to be an advanced, no a 'superior' race, that's what you called yourselves, but you're treating us like lab rats. If you're so superior why can't you see how wrong that is?'

The girl dropped her burning cerise gaze away, seemingly ashamed by his accusation. Another of her kind stepped forward now, sending the child on her way. She cast one furtive and apologetic look in his direction before elegantly rising and stepping out of the room.

'You think we are barbaric?' this new figure asked, his seven feet frame towering over him. All of the Pendorans looked similar — unbelievably tall with white hair and impossibly pale skin punctuated by fiercely bright pink eyes. Their slender frames gave no hint to their gender, only the pitch of this one's voice denoted him as male at some imperceptible level.

'Yes...actually.' McKay raised his chin with pride, feeling a slight tremble in his bottom lip. It wasn't quite the look he'd been going for, but it would have to do. Sheppard never shook with fear in front of these people. Why couldn't he be more like Sheppard? As the Pendoran continued to glare at him, his resolve shattered into a million pieces. 'Please don't hurt me any more than you already have for saying that.'

'Pain is used as a motivator. We would not use mindless violence...we are above such things,' the male assured him, though his expression remained severe and just the wrong side of threatening.

'If you want information on the Ancients or the Wraith we have plenty of it...a whole database full of it. And we'd be willing to share in trade for an insight into some of your technologies...no need for all the tests and mind probing.'

The alien tilted his head and eyed him curiously, the faintest flicker of a smile touching on its thin, lipless mouth. 'A trade? But why would we do that when we can take what we want?'

'Because it's fair,' he complained, ignoring the slightly childish words, _And this isn't fair! _that formed now in his brain.

'I am unconvinced that sharing our knowledge with you would be in any way beneficial to us. The process of learning is just as fascinating as the final result after all, would you not agree?'

'Well, normally yes, but not when you're harming intelligent beings to do it.'

Though this male's face showed little expression, his features shifted a little into something resembling mild annoyance. 'So you are suggesting that your kind has never harmed an inferior life form in the pursuit of progress?'

It was clear from the way he said it, and the way his gazed burned into him that this being knew the truth of the history of scientific advances on Earth. Maybe in their travels the Pendorans had been there and harvested information from some poor, unsuspecting souls who had previously not even known of the existence of alien races. But, sure, they'd used animals and sometimes even people to further their scientific understanding, but using people without their consent was something that would never happen now in any sanctioned experiment. 'Yes, but we've realised that kind of thing is wrong and we've moved on from that. Surely you people have learned that too? We're equals...treating us this way is wrong.'

The male straightened up, giving him a few more inches of height that he really didn't need, then said, 'We have been travelling this universe for millennia. We have possessed advanced intelligence since long before even single-celled life forms first sprang into existence on your home world. To claim we are equals is an insult. You are but a newborn in this universe...still learning...still finding your way.'

'And this is the example you set to us?' McKay snapped, feeling insulted himself now. 'No offence, but you're not likely to win any good parenting awards any time soon!'

Now it was his companion's turn to proudly raise his chin. He glared down at McKay, and the scientist shrank back into his oversized chair. 'Your session has ended, human. You will be returned to your cell.'

McKay's jaw dropped, and he watched the door behind the male open and allow in two other figures, who gathered him up from the seat and swept him out of the room, his feet barely touching the floor. These adults were immovable...there was just no sense of humility to appeal to. Maybe Sheppard was right about talking to the kid...


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Intermittent flashes of light assaulted his retinas, just as they had so many times before. He became aware of the pressure of fingers holding back his lids as the light hit his other eye once, twice, three times, before letting them go again once it was clear he was waking.

The room came into view a millimetre at a time as Sheppard strained open his eyes for himself now. His body buzzed with heightened awareness of its condition; the steady beating of his heart, the rush of blood through his veins, the ever-increasing functions of his mind. The lights seemed a fraction brighter in the shadowy lab, the voices of the Pendorans around him crisper. He'd never felt so alive.

Three faces appeared leaning in over him, helping him to figure out he was stretched out on his back on an examination table, fully restrained as usual. 'He is awake,' one said, stating the achingly obvious.

'Wha...what happened?' he asked, for the moment struggling to remember how he had ended up back in their lab.

'We have just implemented another augmentation treatment.'

His brain pulsed, and he closed his eyes briefly, taking a second or two to compose himself and adjust to the new sensations his body and mind were experiencing. 'Great... I was just thinking I could use another one of those,' he quipped, a weak attempt to keep his spirits up in the face of another battery of tests.

'There is a notable increase in his synaptic activity,' one of his 'doctors' commented, peering back over his shoulder at some equipment lurking in the far recesses of that murky room.

'And yet he still demonstrates no unusual capabilities,' another said, a slight hint of frustration in his words.

He might not be showing them, but Sheppard could feel the changes again – this time even more so. Everything about him felt different...more alert...more energised. But he wasn't about to let them see their experiments had been successful. 'Oh, well. I guess you might as well stop wasting your time on me –'

'Perhaps he is hiding his capabilities from us. I'm sure he is more than aware that success would lead to more treatments and he has resisted that course of action from the very start.'

Damn! They'd figured him out already, but that wasn't a total surprise considering how smart they were. Maybe he could still bluff his way through this. If he didn't react to any of their tests they would have no real reason to know how different those synaptic responses made him. 'No...honestly, I'm just not feeling all that special right now.'

'Carry out the first test,' the one nearest his head commanded without missing a beat.

A moment later, Sheppard felt the wind knocked right out of him as something landed heavily on his abdomen. When he strained to lift his head, he saw a relatively small metallic ball sitting on his torso. 'What the hell is that?' he wheezed.

'A ball of salradium, a dense metal from the Septern quadrant of the Mygayelln Galaxy. We have increasing sizes of these weights that we will drop on you to test your increased physical strength.'

It seemed an odd way to test strength, then a whispery voice in his head that he presumed belonged to the Pendoran's mind said _telekinesis_, which made a lot more sense. They weren't testing his strength...they were testing his ability to stop them hurting him. Something in his brain activity readings told them he might be able to control movement with his mind. He had halted Teyla's arm even prior to this current treatment, and when McKay had been 'enhanced' by the Ascension acceleration device he'd been able to lift Carson right off the floor using just the power of thought, so had he possibly advanced that far now?

His thoughts cleared as he watched one of his seven-foot captors lift the metal ball off his body, then raise a slightly larger one, dropping it a distance of about three feet down onto him. It hit right in the fleshy part of his abdomen below his ribs, and though he had time to tense his muscles ready for the impact, it still hurt. He sensed, or rather heard their disappointment inside his head, their internalised sighs as loud as if they had spoken them. But beyond the thoughts of his present company he could hear other whispers, more distant than theirs, apparently the thoughts of other beings riding on that ship, something he had only been able hear from those in close enough proximity before. And one mind rang out loud and clear...a raging, broiling angry bellow of emotion and anger that was undeniably Ronon. He hid the relief that little discovery filled him with. His captors had told him the Satedan had nothing unique to share with them so was no longer with them, something he'd always suspected to be a lie. Perhaps his anger was a fascination to them; they seemed to show very little emotion themselves. He absent-mindedly wondered if they might be related to Vulcans...

A third thump on his abdomen helped return his thoughts his current situation, and he hissed as he looked down at this even larger ball. This all reminded him of a virtually homicidal football coach he'd had the dubious pleasure to be tortured by back a high-school. Mr Cunningham had known just how to throw a medicine ball so it caught him in the guts almost every time he passed it to him, something he'd derived a disturbing amount of delight from as he recalled.

'This is most unsatisfactory,' one of the Pendorans commented.

'Need to do more work on my core, huh?' Sheppard joked, causing the trio to exchange a look_. He suspects us, _he heard one of them think. _Damn right, I do_, his mind responded.

He heard a door open and someone else walked in. He was surprised to find it was the young girl, Maebus; though he'd seen her a couple of times since his capture she'd never overseen any of his tests before. She'd mostly worked with McKay. Her pink gaze met his and he heard her think_, Poor creature_, as a fourth, much larger metal sphere was dropped on him. Her sympathy did little else other than annoy him. She viewed him as something akin to a rabbit in a cosmetics lab, not a being of equal worth. But at least she understood the cruelty of the procedures and testing he was undergoing...he might be able to use that.

'We don't appear to be getting the expected results. Perhaps the subject will respond if we adjust the motivation to a more suitable level.'

_Perhaps the subject will respond if we adjust the motivation to a more suitable level? _Sheppard wondered if it was just him or whether that really had sounded as sinister as he imagined. All this scenario needed was a few conical flasks of bubbling, luminous green liquid and a flash or two of lightning and it would be prime horror movie material...mad scientists included.

'Agreed,' another Pendoran replied, and Maebus' eyes now left Sheppard's to follow that individual's movements.

There was a real sense of inevitability about then whole scenario when he returned a few moments later carrying a large surgical knife.

_Yep, that lightning would be real fitting right about now, _Sheppard thought, swallowing hard. He might be able to stop this, might be able to break that knife before it could pierce his skin, but if he did that, restrained as he was, it would only be done by using those powers he so wanted to keep from them...if they were even developed enough to work. His mind began to race through other possibilities, breaking the restraints and throwing the Pendorans across the room to make a bolt for it being the top of his list, but he had no idea if he could do that stuff yet. No, he would have to wait until he had chance to test his skills before trying anything that risky. If he tried and failed in his bid, they might just find a way of harnessing his powers so he couldn't use them against them. Time for some fast talking. 'You don't need to do that –'

The male took hold of his wrist just above the cuff holding it to the table, and broke the surface of his skin with the tip of his blade, drawing it slowly down his forearm from near the elbow joint to where his hand rested. Sheppard squirmed, writhing against the pain, concentrating on not reacting in any way other than to show his physical pain. 'Son-of-a-bitch!'

He looked down at his arm, and for a second or two little happened. Then a dotted line of blood appeared, oozing out and thickening into a steady trickle across his skin. And with that emergence the pain really set in. The bastard had only cut down a few millimetres, just enough to set his nerves alight, but not enough for him to bleed to death. He could handle this...it was only pain. This wasn't life threatening.

The aliens surrounding him looked genuinely puzzled. _Why does he not help himself? _he heard one of them think, though he was too busy riding out the pain to get a bearing on exactly who that comment had come from. There was one damn good reason why he wasn't helping himself. If he showed them any signs of change they would focus on him, just as they had with Teyla as soon as the first physical Wraith traits had emerged in her outward appearance. Now she was more Wraith than Athosian, and he didn't know if she would ever be herself again. He mentally kicked himself for not making them focus on him before, not that he hadn't tried. Teyla's 'treatments' had simply produced faster visible results and after that there had been no stopping them. He couldn't afford that kind of attention falling on him right now if he was going to use his new skills to get them out of there.

His 'doctor' carved a parallel line down his forearm with his monstrous scalpel now, making Sheppard scream through his firmly gritted teeth. What the hell were they going to do? Flay him until he gave them what they wanted?

_The Ancients could heal themselves...why doesn't he? _one of them wondered. So that was it? Their new plan of action was to hurt him enough to want to self-heal. They seemed to have learned a lot about the Ancients in the few weeks he'd been travelling with them. McKay had said they'd put him through a machine that had made his brain feel weird...had they stolen the information from him? Could they raid people's minds that way? Now that would be a piece of technology worth having...

The increased pain in his arm drew his focus. It was tempting to see if he could do it...if he could actually fix his skin and take his pain away, but right now he was formulating a different plan. If he pretended his changes were slow to progress they might just give him another treatment right now. And the more augmentation they could give him, the more he could do to help the others.

'Perhaps the representation of the Ancient gene in this subject is not strong enough,' the young girl suggested, her eyes now fixated on his injuries. 'I am certain he would have proved his capabilities by now if he were able to.'

'The motivation may still not be enough. Pushing him further may warrant the application of his newly developing skills.'

Before he could protest, Sheppard felt a thump in his stomach again. For a moment he wondered why they'd gone back to the metal spheres approach...until the burning ache registered. When he looked down this time, the handle of the surgical knife protruded from his stomach, the blade well buried in his gut. Cold enveloped him as realisation set in. They'd stabbed him? Really? This was what passed for science with the Pendorans?

He reminded himself to breathe, but the pain even that simple action awakened made him hold his breath again. 'Wha' di...d you...d...do that...f...for?' he panted, not that anyone answered him.

The three older Pendorans were all leaning in, watching the injury site with morbid fascination. 'Is it moving at all?'

'No...not any more than can be expected with his current breathing pattern.'

He could sense what they wanted. They wanted him to get the knife out himself. And he knew there was a chance he could do that, maybe even fix himself up, but then they would know what he was capable of and he'd never get away from them. But one voice wasn't so enthusiastic in his mind, and when he dragged his eyes up from the knife to the girl, he could see the horror etched into her pale face. A tear slipped down her cheek, but all she did was stand there and watch, seemingly frozen rigid with revulsion.

So he did the only thing he could think of...he concentrated on her and silently asked her to help him.

It took a second or two to see any reaction, then her eyes slid his way, their intense pink stare now tinged with disbelief. He repeated his request, hoping he was in control of his ability enough to only allow her to hear him. The others continued to observe him impassively, so it seemed his message was only reaching the intended recipient, the first lucky break he'd had so far this session.

'I...I believe we should remove the knife now and commence repairs,' she stammered, addressing her colleagues.

'Give him time,' one of the others murmured, still watching him like a hawk waiting to swoop and pounce on the first sign of special ability.

'Do you not think he would have acted by now if he could help himself?' the girl charged, her voice stronger this time. 'No one would endure this if they could bring it to an end. He needs more augmentation...he is not ready for this level of testing yet.'

Through the tears now stinging his eyes, Sheppard watched the other three exchange a glance. He silently begged them to hurry up and get the knife out of him already, afraid the thought and need was so powerful they might actually hear it. Thankfully, he contained it enough that they didn't, instead deciding the girl might be right and tugging the knife out in one swift and unexpectedly fluid movement.

Sheppard cried out and tried but failed to curl in on the agony as the girl told the others to leave so she could treat his injuries. Watching them depart, she pressed an absorbent pad against the wound and said nothing until the door had closed behind them. Once they were gone her whole demeanour took on a new urgency, and she lifted his shirts to examine the damage. As soon as the material was away from his skin Sheppard felt the rush of blood pumping out of the hole, its heat pooling quickly on his torso. The girl gasped, and though he hadn't thought it possible she seemed to turn a shade paler at the sight of what the others had done.

'If you can help yourself, this would be a good time to do it,' she whispered earnestly, fixing him with her piercing pink gaze. 'I promise I will not breathe a word of the truth to the others.'

Though he had no reason to trust her, Sheppard found he did. Of all the Pendorans he'd encountered on that amazing ship, she was the only one who had shown even a hint of conscience about what was being done to them.

'Free...my hands...please!'

She hesitated, and he could see the genuine fear in her expression at the thought of releasing him while she was there alone. Speaking was too hard now, so he sent her his thoughts, swearing he wouldn't harm her.

The young girl nodded and opened the cuffs without waiting another moment to think her decision through.

Sheppard closed his eyes and held his shaking hands over the excruciating injury, feeling heat build beneath his palms first, then a marked decrease in the pain shooting through his gut. But the process was exhausting in his current condition, and he blacked out before he could finish...

When he came to again the girl was sealing his damaged skin with a small laser. Apparently hearing the change in his breathing she looked his way and smiled. 'You did enough to prevent the heavy bleeding. I'm repairing what was left to do when you lost consciousness.'

For the moment, the pain was all gone, but he was mad at himself for passing out. He liked to be in control, and for a few minutes at least he'd had to rely on her to save him...an alien who had helped facilitate their torture for the past three weeks.

'How much longer?' he asked.

She gave him a puzzled look as she set down her equipment and laced her long, slender fingers before her. 'What do you mean?'

'How much longer do we have to go through this?' he clarified, anger making his tone more churlish than he'd intended; she had, after all, helped him when he'd asked her to.

'There is still more for us to learn from you...'she replied, picking up a swab of a lint-like material and soaking it in a bowl of liquid. She said what she knew she should say, but he could tell the conviction had left her. When this whole process had begun she had been as fervent about the importance of their work as the others, but now her belief in their project seemed shaken. Knowing this might be his only opportunity to work on her since he saw her so rarely, he tried to appeal to whatever shred of humanity had steered her to help him and keep it from the others.

'I know you can see how wrong this is, Maebus' he said, flinching as she cleaned the newly sealed scar with the cold liquid that ran down his side to the skin not currently numbed by anaesthetic.

'It is our way. We are explorers and scientists; we strive to learn...it is what we exist for.'

'I work with scientists and explorers too, and, believe me, this is not the only way to go about making your discoveries.' He lifted his head to look her straight in the eye, giving her his best wounded puppy look, the one he always used on the nurses at Atlantis when he wanted them to sneak him extra food. 'We're not so very different from one another...not really...and I'm pretty sure you would never do this to one of your own.'

'No...never!' she gasped.

'So why is it okay to do this to us? That woman you're holding back there in the cells...the one you're turning into a Wraith without her consent, she's a leader of her people and a mother to a young son...they need her. Dr McKay...he's the foremost scientist back at our base. Ronon, the big guy you've been keeping separate from us, and yeah, I do know you still have him because I can hear his thoughts, he's one of only a few hundred Satedans left in this galaxy because the Wraith culled his planet. They're all valuable in their own right. You can't destroy them just to gain a little more knowledge.'

'And what of you?'

He looked back at her as her eyes searched his face. 'What about me?'

'You make a case for each of the others...is there no reason that John Sheppard should be spared?'

A grim smile broke out on his face. 'To be honest, I'm not all that special. There are more military men than you can shake a stick at where I come from.'

'I suspect your friends would say differently; a man who puts the needs of others before his own is special indeed.'

The door opened, and the others returned now, crowding around his table. The girl only just had time to replace the cuffs around his arms in the time it took them to cross the room. Though it left him vulnerable again, he sensed no malice in her actions. She was still considering helping him; that was more than he'd believed possible when he'd begged her to think things over.

'Is the sample repaired?' one asked, pulling at his freshly knitted skin.

'He is, but he needs rest before you apply another treatment and testing procedure. He should be returned to his holding cell for now.'

The older male looked at her with a hint of frustration, then nodded. 'Agreed, we'll continue this tomorrow.'

Sheppard let out a small, inaudible sigh of relief. Though his stomach hurt now as whatever anaesthetic the girl had used wore off, he still felt stronger and more powerful than he had in many, many days. If they could take him back to the cells, to McKay and Teyla, getting everyone out would be simpler. Because now they had given him the skills he needed to get out of there. Now, he felt invincible.

oooOOOooo

McKay was relieved to see Sheppard return to the cell, though not quite so happy when he realised the man was being practically carried by the two Pendorans flanking him. That 'not so happy' turned to downright irate when he saw the glisten of thick, dark blood staining Sheppard's shirtfront.

'Oh my God! He's bleeding. What did you do to him?'

'I'm okay, Rodney,' Sheppard was quick to assure him. 'They fixed me up...it's nothing serious.'

Though he'd said that, it was easy to hear the strain in Sheppard's voice. 'You're covered in blood – how can that not be serious?' McKay squeaked.

'I said I'm okay,' Sheppard repeated, then in a whisper he added. _Just let them put me back in the cell._

It took just a second for McKay to realise he hadn't actually seen Sheppard's lips move when he'd said that, then it dawned on him just what had happened. He'd never had much of a poker face, but he did his absolute best not to react in any way the Pendorans would notice.

'Should we remove the female from his cell?' one of the Pendorans asked as they dumped Sheppard in a crumpled pile. He crawled to the bars nearest Rodney and sat up, resting his back against them. He really didn't look okay and Rodney felt his panic response kick in at the thought Sheppard would soon be as lost to him as Teyla was. Soon it would just be him left to get them out of there, and he wasn't sure he could do it alone.

'No. Astuerun still wants to see if having him nearby makes her more aggressive. He believes something in his genetics makes her react to him due to their species' previous feud. He's preparing an observation room where we can monitor their interactions more closely and step in whenever necessary, but those chains will hold her until then.'

'No they won't! If you leave her in there with him she'll kill him!' McKay protested, but again Sheppard's voice invaded his mind.

_It's okay, Rodney. We need Teyla here_.

Rodney didn't even look Sheppard's way, just hoped the Pendorans didn't listen to him and left Teyla where she lay chained to the bars on the far side of Sheppard's cell. He needn't have worried; they hadn't listened to a single one of his objections so far, and they didn't listen now. The duo simply closed and activated the lock on the cell door, the three white lights on it turning red to show it was now bolted shut, and strode from the room, their rangy frames allowing them to cross the floor to the doorway in just a few paces.

Once they were gone, McKay squatted behind Sheppard, where he still leaned with his back to him against the bars separating them. 'Guess the experiments are taking effect, huh?' he asked.

Sheppard lifted his lolling head. 'Yeah...yeah, they are...have been for a few days now.'

'So you can do the whole mind reading and telepathy thing?'

'Apparently.'

'Where's all that blood from? What did they do to you?' he asked, noticing the gashes on Sheppard's forearm now too. His stomach lurched at the sight of them. He really didn't do blood.

'They decided to test whether I could heal myself,' Sheppard grumbled, pushing himself up straighter and groaning at the movement.

'And you couldn't,' McKay finished, drawing the obvious conclusion.

'Actually, I could...I just didn't want them to see it.'

'Then do it now!'

'I can't...need to keep what strength I have for getting out of here.'

Rodney looked around at the bars, seeing no discernable change in their situation. They were still as trapped in those cells as they ever were. Why save his strength for something so futile?

'Besides, it's not that bad now,' Sheppard continued, sliding his back up the bars as he pushed up from the floor using just his legs and the cage for support. 'I did manage to fix myself up a little while the girl treated me...then I passed out.'

Rodney immediately panicked at that news. 'I thought you didn't want them to know you could do it!'

'She promised not to tell anyone.'

'Oh, well if she promised...'

'It was that or bleed out, Rodney. I think I did the right thing under the circumstances. But waiting for the others to leave left me too weak to finish the job, and now I need what strength I have to get us out of here. Maebus may be the youngest Pendoran here, but she's shown more compassion and maturity than any of the others. I trust her, okay?'

Rodney stood up too, feeling queasy at the thought of how much his two friends had changed and suffered. Being rapidly advanced on the way to Ascension had almost killed him once, and Sheppard looked frighteningly pale and sick. What if he collapsed right here in front of him and no one came to help?

'Okay, so Maebus aside, how do you plan to get us out exactly?' he asked, trying to get his mind on a different track.

'Using the tools they gave me,' Sheppard told him.

Rodney noticed something from the corner of his eye – one of the red lights on the lock had turned white.

'Are you doing that?' he gasped.

'Well, I was until you interrupted me,' Sheppard sighed, casting him a weary look.

'Right...shutting up!' McKay muttered, wrapping his arms around himself and backing off a little. Although the changes the Ancient gene manipulation device had made to him had been amazing and exciting, he also remembered all to well the fear that accompanied the realisation of how different he'd become and how he had to either ascend or die. Was the same thing happening inside Sheppard right now?

A second light turned white. McKay watched Sheppard's profile, his eye's tight shut in concentration, and marvelled at the control he had established so quickly. Maybe having a natural ATA gene made all this come easily to him...maybe it wouldn't kill him.

'McKay, could you try not to worry so loudly, you're interfering with my thoughts,' Sheppard growled, still facing the lock.

Rodney tried to empty his mind, no mean feat considering how much stuff was always rattling around in there, and while he did that, Sheppard got the final part of the lock open. The door slid back and Sheppard walked out.

'You did it!' McKay felt a crooked smile set in as he realised they had a real chance to get free for the first time. 'Can you do mine, too?'

'Well, that was the plan,' Sheppard replied, swaying even as he said it. He took a couple of steps to regain his balance, then closed his eyes and started to concentrate once again.

_He's gonna pass out before he gets it open! _McKay panicked, holding his hands up in apology as Sheppard's eyes flashed open and sent him a murderous glare. 'Sorry...I'll stop thinking.'

'That'll be the day,' Sheppard muttered, starting again.

McKay managed the seemingly impossible, keeping his thoughts quiet enough for Sheppard to set him free without much more delay. But the effort of telekinetically decoding those locks clearly exhausted him, and he was forced to take a moment to steady himself against a wall until he regained his composure and strength.

'Takes it out of you, huh?' McKay half-sympathised, while crossing to the doorway out and wishing he would hurry up and pull himself together already.

'You do know I can still hear you, right?' Sheppard panted.

'Well can't you stop...hearing me?' McKay protested.

'Trust me,' Sheppard said, straightening up at last. 'If I could stay out of that chaotic sprawl you call a brain I would, but you're a little overwhelming at this proximity.'

'Oh...right.'

Sheppard headed back into his cell and crouched beside Teyla, grasping the chains binding her to the bars.

'What are you doing?' McKay rasped.

'Getting her out. What did you think I was gonna do with her?'

'I dunno...maybe leave her here and come back with reinforcements to save her...and a really big tranquiliser gun.'

'If we get off this ship, and I gotta say that's still a pretty big 'if', there's no coming back to get her. This ship can move faster than any other ship created. We'd never catch up with them again.'

'No...no, of course not...I didn't think.'

Sheppard just arched an eyebrow at that comment, then said, 'If you wanna help, McKay, see if you can't get that door open while I get these chains undone.'

'On it!' Feeling useful at last, McKay set to work dislodging the cover of the control panel and after quickly assessing the mechanism began to rewire it and reroute power. The locks on their prison cells had been a far more complicated affair, sealed units with no access or weaknesses and electrified so no one could touch them, but these were relatively simple in comparison. He supposed the Pendorans hadn't seen any need to make the normal door locks as impenetrable because no one was supposed to get out of the cells, and if it hadn't been for Sheppard's new 'super' powers, they would have been right. Oh, he was so going to be even more popular with the women now he could do all those fancy tricks.

'I _am not_ planning to use my skills to impress the ladies, Rodney. Now focus!'

'Focus, right...focus...' He set back to work, the door opening with a satisfying hiss just as he heard the sound of chains breaking behind him.

Teyla was now untethered, though thankfully also still unconscious. Sheppard laid her down then took hold of one of her wrists. 'Get her other arm.'

Though his natural instinct was to keep his distance, Rodney forced himself to remember that the Wraith-like creature sprawled out in front of him was all that was left of Teyla, a woman who had been a good friend to him on many occasions. So he grasped her other arm as Sheppard had asked him to and helped him haul her toward the door. He was scared, but he was more scared of leaving her behind. How would they ever explain that to Kanaan and Torren? If Sheppard thought he could do this, then who was he to say the man couldn't?

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews so far. Please keep them coming. And thanks also for the birthday good wishes. I'll hopefully have the last part of this story up tomorrow, though it all depends how well I get on today since i'm still writing it. Wish me luck!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Okaay...wellll...I know I said this was going to be three parts, but it's kind of...grown. I'm still finishing up the last part, so I thought it would be better to split it and give you something today rather than make you all wait. So this is now going to be a four part story. Part four will hopefully be up some time on Friday because I'm out all day today visiting my sister who also celebrates a birthday this week, and I won't get to finish and tweak it until then. My mom was clearly only ever fertile once a year...**

**Thanks again for all the reviews. They are very much appreciated. **

**Chapter 3**

After trailing Teyla's unconscious form along numerous corridors, Sheppard wasn't feeling quite as invincible as he had back in the laboratory. A sheen of sweat soaked his body and his breathing laboured, but he was damned if he was going to stop now. It seemed the kid had been true to her word and mentioned nothing of his abilities to her colleagues, and now they were moving freely around the Pendoran ship, arousing no suspicion with their absence. Hopefully, it would take a while to get that observation room they mentioned ready, and that would give them plenty of time to make their escape.

Beside him, Rodney was also perspiring, and struggling to catch his breath. 'Who...would've thought...someone ...could weigh... this much?'

Sheppard felt guilty that he hadn't been able to take more of the strain himself, but his earlier blood loss meant he was battling dizziness and an encroaching lethargy that threatened to sap what was left of his strength reserves. At least, he hoped it was just the blood loss. 'Maybe Wraith are more...dense,' he suggested, giving one last haul and then letting go to rest as they came to a junction in the passageway.

'So, which way now?' McKay asked, also releasing his grip on their cargo.

'Shhh. I'm listening,' Sheppard told him, closing his eyes and trying to hear something that would give them a clue which route would take them closer to Ronon.

'Listening for what? Are they coming?'

His eyes snapped open again. 'Well, if they are I won't be able to hear them over your constant questions.'

Sheppard felt bad as his friend apologised yet again and shrunk into himself, all the time keeping his terrified eyes glued to Teyla's unconscious form. He had to admit he was afraid she would wake up soon himself, but he just didn't have the time to worry about it. He needed to locate Ronon. The Satedan would be a big help with lugging Teyla to their jumper since he and McKay were struggling to manage it between them. He felt a twinge in his stomach, reminding him that he was in no fit state to be dragging Teyla around at all. He pressed his palm into it hard, the pressure dulling the discomfort enough for him to listen out for their friend again.

Thankfully, Ronon wasn't the type to let go of anger, and despite the fact they'd been held for weeks now, he was still as furious as the last time they'd seen him, just before they'd all been knocked unconscious and imprisoned. He could hear his rage no matter how far away he was, ringing out loud and clear above the thoughts of the ship's other inhabitants.

Sheppard's brain was working at a higher level of functioning than he'd ever imagined possible; not only could he hear the Pendorans thoughts, but he could picture their locations, piecing the information together is if he were completing a 3D jigsaw puzzle and then using it to figure out a route that would help them avoid discovery.

'We go left,' he announced, snatching up Teyla's wrist and starting to pull her. McKay joined in the chore, staying silent, though Sheppard could hear him quietly repeating the mantra,_ Stay quiet...let him concentrate,_ over in his mind. He was glad the scientist had something else to focus on other than his fear; it made the volume of his thoughts far more manageable.

Though his load was heavy and dangerous, Sheppard wouldn't even consider leaving Teyla for a second. He'd watched her steadily changing over the past three weeks, increment by increment, as the Pendorans had monitored her gradual and painful transformation. He'd held her in his arms every time she'd returned to the cell through those first two terrible weeks, felt the burning heat in her skin, had tried to still the convulsions as pain wracked her body, all the time remembering his own conversion after being infected by the mutated retro-virus Ellia had taken. He'd watched Teyla morph from the gentle-natured but strong team member he'd always admired into a clawing, salivating, seething mass of primal instinct that wanted nothing more than to suck him dry of his life force and leave him a withered husk. If she could be saved he was determined to do it; and only for a fleeting moment did he allow himself to wonder what would become of her if these changes were permanent. He had to believe he could get them all home to Atlantis and they could all return to normal. That was the only acceptable outcome. Torren needed his mother; Sheppard knew what it was like to grow up without one.

Again, he had to stop and take a breather, leaning heavily on the wall and pressing on his scar for relief from the pain. This was harder than he'd ever imagined it would be. He'd thought his 'improvements' would help, but he just couldn't use them to do everything in his weakened state. He felt shaky and feeble, but he damn well refused to give in to the urge to sit down as say he couldn't make it.

'You okay?' McKay asked quietly, looking like he was about to pat his back, then thinking better of the gesture.

'Yeah...jus' need a minute,' Sheppard told him, his vision whirling in a nauseating dance. But he could hear Ronon's sheer anger loud and clear now. They were close to him, and if they could just drag Teyla those last few hundred yards, Ronon could take over and free him up to use his energies elsewhere. That thought got him upright again, and they forged on until they came to a corridor where their path was blocked by doors that didn't instantly draw back at their approach.

'He's in here,' Sheppard whispered. 'Think you can do your thing with the door again?'

'Sure...but you might do it quicker.'

'I might, but the way I feel right now I'm not sure I could then get Ronon's cell open, and we really need me to do that.'

McKay nodded his understanding, prising the front off the controls and quickly re-routing wires until the doors gave way to them.

Inside the room they revealed were a number of cells like the ones they'd left behind, and in the one in the furthest corner from the door a hunched figure sat on the floor, head hanging amid a mass of dreadlocks, arms draped over his raised knees.

At first he didn't look up, as if he was used to people approaching his cell and had no interest in what they had to offer. For a moment, Sheppard was worried about what he might see when Ronon showed his face, but he didn't sense any change in his friend; his anger was purely driven by his separation from the rest of them and his inability to break free.

When Sheppard didn't say anything, Ronon head raised a little, his green eyes glaring out from between dangling locks. Then, when he saw who it was standing in from of him, the rage in his expression softened just a little.

'Took your time,' he grumbled, still not moving.

'Yeah, sorry about that – we had a few problems,' Sheppard replied, closing his eyes and concentrating on the door holding back his friend.

'What's he doin'?' he heard Ronon ask.

'He's getting you out...it's a long story,' McKay explained, keeping it brief.

'Oh,' Ronon grunted, apparently accepting that. It was a quality Sheppard had always liked in the Satedan; he never used a sentence where one word would do. Somehow it nicely counterbalanced McKay's verbosity it times of trouble and kept him sane.

A minute later the red lights on Ronon's cell door turned white and the door slipped open.

Ronon bounced to his feet, hesitated just a second, said thanks with a confused 'I don't know what just happened there, but I'll take it as a good thing' look, then for the first time noticed what was lying on the floor just behind McKay.

'What the hell is that thing doing here?' he demanded, looking like he was about to leap on Teyla and snap her neck with one hand.

'Ronon stop!' Sheppard ordered. 'That's Teyla!'

The huge man spun to look at him, and the whirl of anger and confusion in his mind became almost overwhelming; Sheppard had to shut him out because the wave of emotion left him reeling.

'How?' was the only word Ronon could utter.

'They've been experimenting on us all. I had my brain probed, Teyla got turned into a Wraith, and Sheppard's on his way to ascension,' McKay explained, continually checking over his shoulder as he began to edge back toward the door.

Ronon looked down at what had once been Teyla, then back at Sheppard, tears glistening in his fierce gaze. He asked for no further information, his lip simply twitching up into a snarl. 'I'm gonna kill them.'

'No time,' Sheppard interrupted, brushing past him and checking the path was clear outside that room. 'We need to get to the jumper and head for the nearest Stargate before anyone realises we're missing. Can you carry her?'

Ronon looked down at Teyla, then, after a short pause, hefted her onto his shoulder. 'Which way to the jumper?'

Rodney looked at Sheppard, too, waiting expectantly for instructions. Sheppard tried to listen out for clues, to dip into the thoughts of their captors to find out what they needed to know. No one was with the jumper or even thinking about it, so he couldn't get a fix on it.

'Uh, I'm not sure, but I think the docking bay would be the best place to start looking since the jumper's too big to move anywhere else we've seen so far.'

'Make's sense,' McKay agreed, silently adding, _Don't question him because he's probably way smarter than you right now_.

So Sheppard took point and led the way, putting out mental feelers for any potential threat to their escape.

oooOOOooo

By the time they were outside the docking bay doors, Sheppard was flagging. Like the cells, this place used a far more secure system to bar passage into the bay, and he doubted McKay could get to the controls they needed to override...so this one was down to him.

He started to concentrate on the complicated locking mechanism, his legs buckling as soon as he diverted all his energies to the activity. Keeping them safe on their way there had taken a lot of mind power; he didn't have much left to give.

'Sheppard!' McKay squawked, panic lacing his voice.

Sheppard leaned his head against the doors and gave a dismissive flap of his hand. 'I'm good...I'm good...' he insisted, though he felt pretty sure the door was the only thing stopping him face-planting on the floor right.

'You are not good...you're about as far from good as you can get. Let me see if I can get this open...'

'No, Rodney. I got this.'

Sheppard got back on his feet, admittedly still a little shakier than he would have liked but at least he was upright. Leaning on the door for additional support, he began to visualise the locking mechanism, unlocking it one step at a time.

When the final part of that lock drew back he commanded the doors to stay in place while he whispered to the others, 'Stay here. There's a couple of Pendorans inside I need to deal with, then you can follow me in.'

'You're in no condition to take them down,' Ronon rumbled, making to set Teyla down.

'I'm not planning on getting into a fist fight, buddy,' Sheppard told him. Then he gave them both a firm look. 'I can do this...trust me.'

McKay gave him a nervous smile and a twitchy nod, while Ronon just stared back at him intensely, then shrugged. 'Okay.'

It took several minutes for the door lock to give up, but give up it eventually did. Sheppard stood straight, made sure he wasn't going to fall the first time he took a step, then ordered the doors apart just wide enough to let his slim frame through, leaving a sticky trail of blood on the inner edge of the left door panel as his shirt brushed against it.

The two Pendorans were further down the bay, servicing one of their own craft. Occupied with their work, they didn't hear him approaching, giving him a chance to get right up close before one of them lifted his head from the engine he was fine tuning and spotted him.

'Hey, guys,' Sheppard smiled, giving them a nonchalant grin.

'One of the samples!' the Pendoran gasped, causing the other to snap his head round in response.

As they both rounded on him, armed with the tools they'd been using, Sheppard's lost the smile and raised both his hands, lifting the two Pendorans clear off the floor and then slamming them together, knocking them out cold.

'That was so...cool!' he whispered to himself, remembering to open the door a little further to let his friends through.

He turned towards them, enjoying the moment right up until the point everything went black...

'There he is...That's right, Sheppard. Let's have those eyes open.'

McKay and Ronon's faces slowly emerged from the fog clouding his eyes as Sheppard's consciousness took up residence again. He blinked quickly and attempted to sit up, thankful that Ronon was there to grasp his forearm and hold him steady before he could flop back again.

'You okay?' Rodney squeaked.

'Yeah...yeah...I'll be fine once we get off this ship. How long was I out?

'Not long...thirty seconds tops,' McKay replied with a crooked and relieved smile. 'You just needed a power nap, right?'

'Right...I feel better already,' Sheppard lied, hoping to reassure him. Then he noticed something. 'Uh, guys...where's Teyla?'

'She's right...Oh crap!' McKay had turned to look at a spot on the floor behind both him and Ronon where they had presumably left her, and which was now conspicuously unoccupied.

'You lost her?' Sheppard hissed. 'I'm out for thirty seconds and you lose her!'

'Well, we were busy trying to wake you up!'

Ronon took hold of Sheppard's arm again and ripped him up from the floor to a standing position far quicker than his brain was happy to accommodate. He swayed, grasping Ronon's shirt and hanging on until his balance kicked in.

'She won't go far,' he told them.

'How'd you know?' Ronon asked, his eyes scanning the room for any signs of movement.

''Cos she's hungry.'

McKay's eyes almost bulged out of their sockets, and he immediately scooted behind his man-mountain companion. 'And we're unarmed!'

'Not entirely...you have me,' Sheppard reminded him.

'You just passed out!' the scientist squeaked, unconvinced.

'And now I'm awake again.'

'That's not very reassuring!'

'Shhh!' Ronon hissed, cutting short their argument. 'Listen.'

They all listened, a horrible throaty growl carrying to them from somewhere nearby.

'She's close,' Ronon whispered, his lips curling into a half-smile

'Well, thank you for stating the glaringly obvious!' McKay shrieked, visibly trembling.

Sheppard reached out to Teyla with his mind, forming a connection, seeing what she could see. She was up high...way off the ground. She'd climbed up on top of one of the Pendoran craft and...was looking down on them.

He barely had time to bowl his friends out of the way before Teyla struck, landing on his back and shredding both his clothes and his skin with one hand, while grasping his hair to slam his forehead into the cold, hard floor with the other. Momentarily stunned and vulnerable, he was vaguely aware of Ronon's battle cry just before Teyla's weight lifted off him, taking most of the back of his BDU shirt with her. It took a few seconds longer for him to shake off the fugue and kick back into gear, and by then Teyla had flipped Ronon onto his back and was hissing and clawing at him while Ronon held her off at arm's length, his muscles quivering with the effort.

'Sheppard!'

Sheppard rolled onto his side and raised his hand, lifting Teyla off of him. 'I can't hold her forever! Get something to restrain her!'

'Like what?' McKay asked, still looking terrified.

'Your belt or something,' Sheppard grunted, already feeling the strain of holding her.

'Are you kidding? In the cells they had to use chains. A belt isn't gonna do it!'

'It's better than nothing!'

'I will kill you, Sheppard. I will feast on your life while your friends watch on helpless,' Teyla screeched in rage, limbs wheeling as if trying to propel herself through the air toward Sheppard so she could rip his arm right out of its socket.

A sudden and undeniable fatigue hit him, the effort of keeping her at bay in an instant too much to sustain. His eyes rolled back, just for a second, then he snapped back into focus, raising Teyla up again just as her feet almost touched the floor.

Teyla hissed, grinning with ferocious glee as she watched him growing weary.

'Oh, my God! Sheppard, don't pass out yet. We need you to hold her,' McKay screeched, fumbling his belt out of his clothing, while Ronon did the same.

Sheppard tried to obey that request, he really did, but a haze began to creep in on him and he knew he couldn't fight the encroaching darkness any longer. He passed out to the sound of McKay's panicked thought,_ I'm not gonna make it to forty!_

oooOOOooo

'He's back!'

Sheppard snapped his eyes open, ready to fight. McKay and Ronon leaned over him, looking...happy. They were actually smiling. When he'd blacked out he'd been sure they'd all been about to die at Teyla's hands. So what the hell had happened?

'Wha...?' was unfortunately about as far as his vocabulary could stretch for the moment.

'Maebus tranquilised Teyla for us,' McKay explained. 'She came to the cells to check on you and when she found us missing she figured out we'd head for the jumper.'

Sheppard looked around at the dark walls of the cabin surrounding them, spotting unrecognisable tech and compartments dotting the dark walls behind his friends. 'This isn't the jumper,' he pointed out warily.

'No...no it's a Pendoran Scout Vessel, they use them to carry out reconnaissance on new planets to check if they're worth visiting.'

Sheppard looked from McKay to Ronon and back again. 'So who's flying?'

'Maebus...at the moment,' Rodney confessed, looking worried. 'Although I was kinda hoping you might take over now you're awake 'cos I'm not sure a kid should be flying this thing.'

'You think I am a child, Dr McKay?' Sheppard heard Maebus call back to them.

'Well...yes, actually,' Rodney replied, casting her a puzzled look.

As McKay turned to look her way, Sheppard could see Maebus' tall, slim form sitting at the controls of their ship. She certainly looked like a youngster to him, at least compared to the other Pendorans they'd seen. Had they somehow been mistaken?

'I supposed it is understandable that you would think of me as young,' she conceded, 'This body has, indeed, only been in existence for approximately fourteen of your Earth years. But I am old, Dr McKay, very old.'

Something suddenly clicked with McKay, like the proverbial lightbulb moment. 'You're clones...like the Asgard. You transfer your minds from one body to another.'

She seemed to ponder that a moment. 'Yes, something like the Asgard, although their cloning process was never as effective as ours. So sad about them...they were a truly brilliant race...'

Maebus returned her attentions to the controls, taking them rapidly through space.

'You think we should mention the Asgard we ran across in Pegasus?'

'No...she'd probably just wanna stick them in a cage and poke at them,' Sheppard quipped.

'Huh? Good point.'

'So, what happened to the jumper?' Sheppard asked, levering himself up into a sitting position.

'The Pendorans had stripped it right down to its basic components to study how it worked. Not even you would have been able to piece the thing back together in time for an escape.'

He thought it odd that Rodney would say that, as if he thought Sheppard was smarter than him now. It must have taken a lot for him to admit that, even in such a seemingly passing comment. He sensed sadness in his friend...and disappointment. Intelligence was everything in Rodney's life, well...almost everything, although Dr Keller was up there in the rankings too these days, and now he thought he was getting left behind...fearful he wouldn't be the 'go to' genius of Atlantis anymore.

But then another thought struck him, and Rodney's lack of self-confidence wasn't a priority any longer. 'Where's Teyla?'

'Do not concern yourself, Colonel Sheppard,' Maebus instantly chimed up. 'She is currently unconscious in our cargo hold. Even when she wakes, she should not be able to break free of it.'

The moment of panic that had seized him released its grip and he breathed easy again as Ronon helped him up into a seat. For one horrible moment he'd thought she'd been left behind, but no, they'd all made it out as he'd hoped. 'Thank God!'

'Thanks to Maebus, actually,' Rodney corrected with a smirk. 'You were right about trusting her.'

'So, what's the plan?' he asked. It wasn't that he needed to ask, he could have just read Maebus' mind to know, but it seemed an unnecessary intrusion, not to mention a waste of strength.

'We had not travelled too far while we were testing you because we planned to study more species from the Pegasus region before leaving the galaxy. We're making good time, and once we reach the outskirts of Pegasus I will take you to a safe planet with a Stargate, from where you can make your way home,' Maebus told him. 'You need not fear, in a few days at most you will be home and we have supplies enough to keep us going until then.'

'What about Teyla?'

Maebus looked saddened at the thought of his friend's condition. 'Teyla is still not quite Wraith...though not fully human either, and I cannot be sure what toll an incomplete genetic alteration will have on either of you. I believe food will sustain her for now, but I cannot be sure. There is a hatch small enough for us to lower food to her, but not large enough for her to escape through. We can safely feed her, as long as is necessary.'

Sheppard knew what Maebus meant. They would feed her until they made it home, or until she died, whichever was the eventual outcome. The Pendorans had sure as hell done a job on her, on the both of them, in fact. He could only hope Dr Keller could fix things once they got back to her. 'And what about you?' he asked Maebus. 'What will you do?'

'I...I do not –'

In that moment, all power to the ship died, plunging them into complete darkness. A second later, emergency systems kicked in, bathing them all in a jaundiced glow.

'Wh...what just happened?' McKay stammered, eyes huge as saucers.

At first Maebus didn't answer. Her hands fell away from the controls and her arms dropped limply at her sides, her shoulders slumping. 'They have found us.'

'Oh God!' McKay whimpered. 'Are you sure?'

She nodded, turning her seat to face them. 'I was hoping we would move outside of their scanner range before they noticed we were missing,' she sighed. 'It seems they discovered our escape sooner than I anticipated. The mothership flies faster than these smaller craft...they have simply caught up to the point where their disrupter pulse can interfere with power to all but our essential life support systems. Now all we can do is wait for them to arrive and take us back on board. Perhaps it is for the best. I can try to stabilise the results of the experiments...'

'I'll take my chances back on Atlantis, thanks,' Sheppard told her, having absolutely no desire to return to his cell and the daily torture sessions they laughingly called treatments.

'Maybe I can get the power back on,' McKay said, running forward to the controls.

'It will not work,' Maebus told him. 'This is a fails safe we build into all craft to ensure none of our specimens can escape.'

'Okay, well, then we'll wait here like sitting ducks and not even try,' Rodney snapped, folding his arms and brooding. 'Did you ever really intend to help us?'

'McKay!' Sheppard warned, stalking forward and taking charge of the situation. 'Maebus...maybe you should let him take a look. The two of you might be able to figure something out. After all, I'm pretty sure you're gonna be in as much trouble as we are if they take us back on the mothership.'

'If you're gonna do it, better do it fast,' Ronon grunted. 'If their ship's faster than this one it'll be here any time.'

Maebus didn't wait a moment longer, and opened up the panel controlling the engines. Their ship was drifting...dead in the water, so to speak, its previous forward momentum leaving it travelling onward, but at a much slower speed that was reducing all the time. Ronon was right; if Maebus and Rodney didn't fix this thing immediately, they would be back in their cells within the hour. Rodney couldn't take much more...neither could Teyla. And worse than that, Sheppard had a pretty good idea why they'd been keeping Ronon prisoner. Teyla needed to feed soon, and since he and McKay were apparently a source of fascination to the Pendorans, Ronon had to be the food to keep her going...at least until they'd studied her enough. There was no way he would let that happen.

All too quickly something blocked the light from the nearby moon, casting their craft in foreboding shadow. They looked up through the transparent canopy of the cockpit surrounding them to see the Pendoran mothership sliding into position, readying to swallow them up.

'It's too late!' Maebus gasped.

'Not if I have anything to do with it.' Sheppard looked up at the craft and let his mind go free, allowing it to wander those gloomy passageways and find those bearing down on them on the bridge of the mothership. He saw into their minds, learned how the disrupter worked, saw coding and connections...then he lost it as his mind fazed out.

'Colonel Sheppard...you must stop,' Maebus pleaded, rushing to his side where Ronon was already squatting and calling him back. 'You have not had enough treatments yet. You're weak and your body cannot take much more. We didn't prepare you for this level of activity...'

McKay crouched beside him too, now, begging him to stop. 'Sheppard...you don't have to do this. You saw what happened to me when my genetics got altered. This could kill you.'

Sheppard looked into the eyes of his three companions, even Ronon silently imploring him to stop, but he couldn't. He knew it was dangerous, but right now he was their only hope of breaking free again. 'If I have to, I'll damn well ascend to stop them. You're my team. I'll do whatever it takes to get you all home.'

'Sheppard...John...please you know the other Ascended won't let you help us. It's against the rules.' Rodney rarely used Sheppard's first name, and only ever when he thought he was certain to die. Sheppard could feel the fear exuding from them all, fear of capture, but also fear of him sacrificing himself to save them. But what else could he do? If he didn't try this, and they were never rescued, they would most likely remain the experimental subjects of the Pendorans until the day they outgrew their usefulness.

He gave Rodney his best, lop-sided smile. 'C'mon, McKay. When have you ever known me obey the rules?'

McKay tried to smile, but Sheppard could feel his pain at not being able to convince him to stop. Still, there was no time for another plan. He had to try one more time.

He concentrated hard, connecting with the Pendorans again. The ship was right above them, about to collect up the scout vessel. They had a minute at most as they lined their craft up with the docking bay. He mentally scrolled through their control systems on the bridge again, instantaneously understanding what controlled navigation, propulsion, weapons, core systems and the disruptor pulse. Identifying the power relays feeding it, he sent new instructions to other systems, re-routing their power supplies to the disruptor and overloading its circuitry.

'Maebus...get ready...to fly!' he grunted through clenched teeth, as his body started to convulse, his brain burning with the effort. The ship above them began emitting strange sounds, and then a thumping explosion rang out, buffeting their craft.

Sheppard kept up the onslaught on the ship, his mind feeling progressively more disconnected from his physical body, helping him to focus every ounce of energy he had on the task of releasing them from the grip of the disruptor pulse. But they needed more than that, and the primary explosion needed to feedback into other systems; propulsion, weapons, scanners, he didn't want to leave them with anything but the bare necessities to survive while they carried out repairs. There could be no chance of them following them this time. A part of him wanted to destroy them completely, even thought they deserved it, but he wouldn't lower himself to such a murderous act. It would be easy to do. He was a mass of tingling energy...no longer human...leaving that part behind with all its worldly baggage and distracting emotions. This was true freedom, a feeling of peace...of complete unity with the universe. He was letting go of the physical, and it didn't matter. Releasing the ties to his body just made him stronger...

A massive blast blew their craft clear of the mothership and set them on their way.

'You did it, Sheppard,' he heard McKay cry, grasping his body and shaking him. 'You can stop now...Sheppard? Sheppard!'

He was looking on the scene, no longer part of it, removed, impassive, at peace.

Ronon, who had remained crouching beside him throughout, dropped his chin to his chest, and though Sheppard couldn't see his face, the shake of his shoulders told him the man was crying.

Rodney just looked on in disbelief, his jaw hanging, head shaking. 'No...' he croaked. 'That can't be it...Sheppard...John...please!' And then Rodney, too, was crying, sobbing into his hand. 'I should have gotten us away from them sooner...I should've asked Maebus for help like you asked me to. I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry...'

Those words stirred something in Sheppard, something familiar, something he had held onto for so long he realised he actually felt empty without it.

It was...guilt.

And with the recognition of that emotion came a heaviness that weighted him down, anchored him to this place, held him firm and wouldn't let him go. A rush of sound and light surrounded him, whipping up like a tornado out of nowhere, sucking him in and tossing him around until he had no idea of where he was or what was happening. Overwhelmed by the sensations, he gave up to them, allowing the encroaching blackness in the tempest to claim him and take him back to the peace he had enjoyed for so short a time...


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

A brilliant light hit his retina, flicked away, then returned, not once but several times.

Sheppard startled, feeling a hand instantly grip his forearm in response. 'It's okay, Colonel. You're in Atlantis...you're safe.'

There before him, wielding a penlight, was Jennifer Keller. The young medic smiled sympathetically as he battled to bring his heart rate back under control. _Poor guy, I scared the life out of him. _

Sheppard refrained from setting her at ease about that since he figured letting her know he'd heard her thoughts was probably far more disturbing.

He licked his lips, finding them parched and cracked. She immediately called for ice chips, and Marie appeared, feeding them to him slowly to sooth his thirst and not overload him with water. More members of the medical team filed in, and Keller barked instructions to them to adjust and remove various devices he was wired to to accommodate his new status.

His mind was a whirl of questions, but his body felt weak, and he wasn't sure he had the voice to ask them. So he let he team run through their tests and ministrations, nodding and shaking his head where necessary to answer their questions of him, all the time wondering where the rest of his team was, and how long he'd been there.

Eventually, when Dr Keller was satisfied with the data she'd collected , and that they had done all they could to ensure his comfort for the moment, she sent the others on their way and returned to the head of his bed. 'You are a very lucky man, Colonel. Rodney told me they thought they'd lost you, but somehow you hung on in their.'

'I'm notoriously difficult to kill,' he croaked, giving her a lop-sided smile.

'Apparently so. But you're not out of the woods yet. The experiments the Pendorans carried out on you have caused some cellular degeneration. That's why you kept passing out whenever you used those new powers of yours. So for the time being you are on complete bed rest, and I mean complete. You don't move and you especially do not use any of those powers. You're going to need all the strength you have to get through the treatment to return you to normal.'

'You can do that?' he asked, pleased to hear it be too fatigued to show his joy.

'We think so. Rodney's been working on something that should work. He just needs a couple more days to finalised things. Until then, I need you to be as inactive as possible and build up your reserves. You're going to need every ounce of strength you have.'

He nodded, the motion leaving him dizzy and nauseous. He closed his eyes and waited for it to pass, feeling her hand gently squeeze his shoulder. 'I have a couple of people who are pretty desperate to see you. Do you feel up for a short visit?'

He said he did, and as she put her head out the door and called for whoever was out there to come in, he saw a dishevelled looking McKay and Ronon shuffle in, looking sheepish and tired in equal measures.

'Hey, what do you know? Sleeping beauty decided to join us at last,' McKay quipped with a crooked smile.

Dr Keller passed him the cup of ice chips. 'Here, make sure our patient gets some more of these...not too many mind. I'll be back in five minutes.'

'What? How many's too many?' he called after her, but she was already gone, obviously trusting that he couldn't do too much damage in her short absence.

Though relieved to see his two team members, there was now a question he had to ask them, one he seemed to be asking a lot lately. 'Where's Teyla?'

Rodney exchanged a glance with Ronon nodded, who remained quiet and subdued at the foot of the bed. 'She's currently in isolation,' McKay explained. 'We got back here about two days ago and started treatments to try to reverse the effects of the Pendoran experiments this morning. But it's not easy; she's still pretty wild right now, so getting close to her to administer any kind of treatments is difficult. Jennifer and Carson have adapted the retro-virus, but they have to be careful how they administer it. Since Teyla was human to start with they can't be sure how she'll react to it.'

'And Maebus – is she here...is she helping?' he croaked.

McKay winced and dropped a few ice chips into his mouth, alleviating the dryness for a moment. 'Yeah, she's still here. I just left her in the lab studying Teyla's latest blood work along with Carson. She's also helping me to tweak the DNA remapping device that almost made me ascend a few years back to make sure it's safe to put you in...we're not quite there yet, but we should have it ready in another day or two. She thinks the best way forward for both of you is to be treated in increments over the same length of time it took to change you. Anything else might be too much of a strain on your cells. So you're just gonna have to be patient. No demanding those estimated timescales you insist on, you hear?'

That brought a slight smile to his lips as he recalled the number of times he and McKay had argued over the time it would take for him to fix things. But the movement was too much for the taut skin on his lips and he felt it crack, Rodney instantly applying more ice chips to try to ease the tares.

'No more jokes,' he promised, and Sheppard nodded his agreement, even that small movement leaving him drained.

Though his brain still felt foggy, he managed to pull together his next sentence and fire it to McKay clearly enough for him to understand. 'You two okay?'

'Yeah, I'm getting there. I'm actually starting to feel my fingertips again, which helps with the work we're doing since I can type properly now. You should have seen some of the gibberish I was typing the first day I got back...I couldn't tell how hard I was hitting the keys. And Ronon got the all clear on his post mission check-up, so he's been filling his time kicking marines' butts down in the gym. How can he not be okay with that?'

Normally, a comment like that would have brought a broad grin to the Satedan's face, but today he remained sombre. Though he knew he shouldn't be doing it, Sheppard reached out mentally to his friend, feeling his anger at himself for allowing Sheppard to end up in this condition, and despite the scientist's current chirpiness, he felt the same overriding guilt in Rodney, too .

He had to set them right.

'None of...this...was your...f...faults,' he barely whispered, annoyed with himself that he couldn't put more conviction in that statement.

The two men looked at each other, clearly surprised that he had said that. He watched as realisation dawned on McKay first, then Ronon too. 'Hey...no more mind-reading. You supposed to be resting that brain of yours.'

He didn't argue, just that quick dip into their heads had made him feel quite ill. He struggled with the urge to retch, but fought it down. All the same, he felt it was important to repeat. 'You guys...couldn't...have done...any more than...you did...'

He saw McKay tear up just before he turned his head away. Ronon just pressed his lips tight together and gave a sharp nod, clearly still seething with anger at their treatment that he'd been as yet unable to fully vent. Unable to hold his head up any longer to look at him, he allowed it to fall back against the pillows, now spent.

'Sheppard...I just want you to know...well, we both want you to know how grateful we are for the risk you took back there. You were this close to ascending...or dying,' Sheppard cracked open an eye to see McKay holding his thumb and forefinger just millimetres apart. 'For a couple of minutes you were actually gone, then you just took a breath again, like you'd just been holding it. But if Maebus hadn't been there I think we would have lost you; she managed to stabilise you long enough for us to get home. It's just a good thing she retrieved our things before coming looking for us. She knew we'd need our GDOs to get home, and she even salvaged our weapons, although none of them were quite as they had been when we lost them. I spent the two days reaching Pegasus getting the GDO up and running and fixing Ronon's gun. She flew us all the way with hardly any sleep...'

'I'll...have to...thank her,' Sheppard mumbled, letting his lids slide shut again.

'Yeah...when you're feeling up to it,' Rodney replied. 'Maybe we should let you rest. We'll come back later.'

'Ummm? Uh, yeah...sounds good.' He heard them leave as he drifted off to sleep, fighting the urge to go seek out Teyla with his mind and find out how she felt. He didn't really need to do it; it sounded like she would be much as she had been the last time he'd seen her; angry and desperate. He hated to think of her still feeling that way, but she was in good hands now. He'd done everything he could to help her; now he had to leave it to the experts to fix what the Pendorans had done and make her fully well again.

oooOOOooo

That evening, Rodney sat in his lab alone, checking and rechecking the data from the DNA re-sequencing device. Maebus had gone to bed an hour before, exhausted after working thirty-six hours solid on that and the reversal of Teyla's condition, and Zelenka had also withdrawn complaining he's had enough of McKay's insults for one day.

The machine appeared ready to use, but with Sheppard currently stable, McKay wasn't taking any chances. He wanted to spend the day checking every aspect of the programming tomorrow, running tests on Sheppard's blood samples first and observing the results for twenty-four hours to ensure there would be no nasty surprises. The man was sick, but he was in no imminent danger now the Pendorans had stopped their tests.

Teyla's problems, however, were out of his hands. They didn't have a magical machine that could just re-sequence her. They had to rely on Jen and Carson for that, but at least their work on the retro-virus gave them a head start on getting her cured. But it might still be over a week before Teyla was in any condition to speak to them other than to tell them they were all going to die...all she'd managed so far. It was so unnatural to see her that way it sent shivers down his spine every time he thought about it. He couldn't wait to have Teyla the kick-ass mom back. He really missed her.

'Dr McKay, we have a secure message from Earth for you,' Chuck's voice said in his ear, and he responded by asking to have it transferred to his workstation in the lab.

On opening the file, his ears were immediately assaulted by the sound of party blowers, and the discordant tones of Jeannie, Kaleb and Madison all singing 'Happy Birthday'. He'd thought the event had slipped by unnoticed, but he should have known his sister wouldn't forget. Jeannie was sweet that way. He was lucky to have a sister like her, not that he'd ever told her that. He kind of envied the way she was almost as brilliant as he was, but managed to balance it with a normal life. Maybe one day he'd manage that too, although the whole having a family idea completely freaked him out.

The file came to an end and he shut it down with a sigh. All the people he really wished he could share his birthday with were busy with other problems...even Ronon, who was so tied up with stewing in his pent up anger he couldn't even think straight.

A knock on the door jamb made him look up from the now blank computer screen. Jennifer was standing there smiling at him, a sight that filled him with genuine happiness.

'Hey you,' she called, sidling in with one hand behind her back. 'Feel like some company?'

'Absolutely,' he grinned, sliding some of his work aside and dragging up another chair. 'I could use a break.'

Jennifer could barely keep the grin from her own face as she seamlessly hopped onto the proffered seat while planting a chocolate chip muffin with a candle burning on top of it in front of him. 'Happy fortieth birthday, Rodney.'

'Huh!' he chuckled, looking at the offering with glee. 'I didn't know you knew.'

'One of the perks of having access to everyone's medical files,' Jennifer smirked, shuffling back on her chair. 'I took a peek. Aren't you gonna blow out the candle and make a wish?'

Though he'd always considered the idea of extinguishing candles to make wishes come true absurd he did it anyway. It was such a sweet gesture he really didn't want to cause offence. Jen was special to him; she might actually be part of that future he'd been thinking about.

'I just checked on Colonel Sheppard and Teyla. They're both resting comfortably...although Teyla's condition is mostly due to massive doses of sedative.'

He nodded, glancing over at the data he's been working on from the gene re-sequencer. 'They're gonna be okay, right?'

'Yeah...it's just gonna take a while. We can't rush things. But right now they're both stable, and that's a good place for them to be.'

'I know...I just want things back to normal.'

'And everything will be,' she told, leaning in to kiss him on the cheek. 'It's just gonna take a little while.'

He nodded, but patience had never been one of his virtues. This was going to be hard.

'So, you gonna eat that?' Jen asked, dipping her head toward the muffin.

'Oh...yes...yes...' then he looked at her happy smiling face and asked, 'You wanna split it?'

'I thought you'd never ask,' she smirked, producing a knife from her pocket. 'I might just let you have the biggest piece though. 'Need to keep that blood sugar up, right?'

'Right.'

After this I prescribe an early night, and I won't take no for an answer. Anything you had planned can wait a few more hours. The colonel's not going anywhere.'

'You should call him John...at least while you're talking to me,' he said, stuffing a huge chunk of muffin into his mouth.

'Okay...I just wanted to show respect...you know...after everything he did to get you all back safe.'

'It was a little beyond the call of duty...not that Sheppard would see it that way.'

'I'm sure you would have done the same if you were in his shoes,' she told him, taking a more ladylike portion of their shared treat.

'Yeah...yeah, I suppose I would have,' he conceded. He'd come a long way since arriving in the Pegasus Galaxy as a self-preserving, arrogant know-it-all, most of that improvement thanks to the example set by his teammates. He was definitely a better person for knowing them, the kind of person even someone as warm and nurturing as Jen could find potential in. So he was forty now and there were smarter people in the galaxy than him...so what? He was still important and he could help make a difference to Sheppard's recovery. That was way more important than being the smartest person in two galaxies.

oooOOOooo

Though he hated to be pushed around in a wheelchair, Sheppard understood the importance of putting as little strain in his body as possible. He'd spent the past two days doing nothing more than staring at the infirmary ceiling, and the change of scenery alone made it all worth it.

Once they got to the gene re-sequencer, Ronon put on the brakes and took hold of his forearm, helping him to get out and onto his feet. He hated feeling weak and being reliant on others, but he was truly grateful for the big man's support at that moment because he knew he didn't have the strength to lever himself upright.

'Okay, Sheppard. I need you to stand on this spot right here,' McKay instructed, pointing to a position on the floor in front of the machine.

Ronon kept a hold of his elbow as he shuffled forward in his scrubs to the exact place Rodney had pointed at, allowing him time to find his balance.

'Okay, we need everyone to stand clear,' McKay ordered, watching everyone else back off a few steps, leaving Sheppard swaying. 'You ready, Sheppard?'

He felt about as far from ready as he'd ever felt in his life, but that wasn't going to stop him going through with it. He gave a quick nod. 'Do it.'

McKay hesitated as second, and though he wasn't deliberately dipping into his feelings, Sheppard could sense Rodney's fear of failure. He held his friend's gaze and hoped he understood it meant he trusted him. With one final nervous gulp, Rodney turned away from him and activated the device.

A swirl of light and DNA patterns surrounded him and he felt warm, a little too warm. It was all over in seconds, then the light snapped off again. He stayed upright for all of two seconds longer after that before his brain called a time-out and he tipped toward the floor...

'All right, he's coming round. Give him some room.'

Carson's brogue was the first thing he heard as he returned to consciousness on the laboratory floor. His vision took a while to clear, then he was looking up at a half-dozen worried faces, all eager for him to respond. 'D...did it work?'

'Well, I was a wee bit more concerned with getting you conscious that checking that, son,' Carson half-laughed, clearly relieved to have him awake.

A gurney rolled up beside him, meaning he was going back to the infirmary in an even more frustratingly embarrassing way than he'd arrived. 'Is that really necessary?' he groaned, as the two medics guiding it took up positions and prepared to lift him.

'Yes it is, and I don't want any more complaints,' Carson warned. 'I know exactly what your body's going through, and the only reason you're not in stasis right now is because I'm pretty sure we can fix you with the work we've done so far. I'm not letting you mess this up for the sake of a bruised ego, lad.'

Sheppard had no comeback for that. Carson really did know how he felt having had his own genes scrambled by Michael for longer than he wanted to even think about. So he let the two men lift him and lay him gently on that gurney and take him back to his bed.

Once he was there, the medical team sprang into action, reconnecting him to all the machines he'd left behind half an hour earlier. That done, Carson took a blood sample and a full body scan, and an hour later he was back with results.

Ronon and Rodney were there when he returned, having not left his side since the first application of that machine. But now, Carson ushered them away, keen to talk to Sheppard in private.

'Well, we have some good news,' he smiled. 'There's a small but marked improvement in the stability of your DNA, and the scan showed a minute reduction in synaptic activity. You're on your way to recovery, John.'

Sheppard couldn't hide his relief, letting his head fall back against his pillows with a huff of laughter. 'Thanks, Carson. That is good news.'

'Well, it's not me you need to thank. Rodney and Maebus did the hard work.'

Sheppard nodded. 'Where is Maebus?'

'Overseeing the tests on Teyla's samples with Jennifer right now. I understand things are looking promising there, too.'

Those words brought even more of a sense of relief to him than his own good news had. 'That's great,' he said, the last word catching a little in his throat. 'Can I go see her?'

Carson's brow immediately puckered, and he could see the answer in the man's eyes without having to read his mind. 'I think it might be best if you give that a few more days yet,' the doctor suggested. 'To be honest, there's not much of Teyla to see yet, and your condition is still too fragile to warrant any time out of that bed for anything other than your treatments.'

Though far from happy, Sheppard knew Carson would never stop him from going to Teyla without good reason. So he accepted his advice and gave up on the idea for the time being. It would just have to wait till he was stronger, and Ronon and Rodney would have to keep him updated until then.

oooOOOooo

Four days later, Jennifer gave Sheppard the go ahead to take a walk outside of the infirmary. He had now had five treatments and was feeling stronger, and although Ronon and Rodney had insisted on staying with him, he'd asked them to give him some space for just a little while so he could go see Teyla from the observation area over her room.

They agreed to wait outside while he went in and sat down for a while, watching the medical staff taking blood samples and making her comfortable. She looked calm, although he suspected that might be because she was heavily sedated. For the first time he wished he wasn't in the process of being cured; the voices had fallen silent around him, a quiet that was more than welcome, but right now he would have given anything for just a few seconds inside Teyla's head to see how she was doing.

The door to the observation area opened and Carson's head appeared around it. 'I thought I might find you here.'

Sheppard gave him a half-hearted, 'Hey, Carson,' before looking back at Teyla. 'How's she doing?'

Carson perched beside him, taking a deep breath as if he was about to deliver bad news. Sheppard's stomach knotted, and he dragged his eyes away from Teyla to look the doctor's way.

'She's improving. I know it's hard to see yet, but because her physical reaction to the treatments the Pendorans gave her were more visible it's going to take time before she begins to look better. But she's definitely calmer, even when she isn't sedated. I might even consider letting you in to see her in a day or two.'

'That would be good.'

'Yes, I'm sure the two of you will have some things to talk about. If she remembers her time with the Pendorans she'll be feeling bad about attacking you.'

Sheppard's hand instinctively rose to the scars on his face, feeling the raised tissue where the damage had healed over. 'It wasn't her fault.'

'And what happened to Teyla wasn't your fault either...but I'm sure the two of you will figure that out between you.'

Sheppard nodded, watching as the woman strapped to the bed in the room below them shifted in her sleep, her brow puckering as if she were in pain even in her current unconscious state. It made Sheppard sick to think she was still suffering even now, and yet again all he could do was stand by and watch.

'Don't worry, son,' Carson reassured him. 'The team are watching her closely. They'll up her pain meds and bring that under control.'

As if in response, a nurse entered and immediately adjusted the feed on Teyla's IV line. Carson had overseen this process so many times it was almost as if_ he_ could read minds. The medical team was like a well-oiled machine...they didn't miss a thing.

'You're all doing a great job,' Sheppard told him, looking his way again.

The Scot's kind blue eyes met his, then his openness turned to puzzlement. 'Something on your mind, Colonel?'

'I was thinking about what you said a few days ago...about understanding what we'd been through. I guess I understand a little of what you went through with Michael now, too. It was only three weeks, but that sense of helplessness at having to watch someone else suffer and change...I don't think I'll ever be able to forget it. How you coped for as long as you did...'

He couldn't finish the sentence; he just hoped the doctor understood what he meant.

Carson nodded, looking lost in thought. 'You never do forget it,' he confessed, his knuckles whitening as he gripped his seat at the memories, 'but don't ever belittle what you went through because you think I had it worse. Yes, it was horrible watching those poor people suffering in Michael's insane experiments, but had any one of them been a friend...it would have made the whole experience far worse. As a doctor, I'm trained to remain detached to a degree– it's the only way you can get through the days. But sometimes, when someone I know well is really struggling...those are the days that really stick with you.'

Now it was Sheppard's turn to nod. Carson was right; he was trained to remain detached too, but when it was your friends' lives on the line, it simply wasn't that easy.

'Anyway, I think I've hogged enough of your time,' the doctor said with a sigh as he pushed up from his seat. 'I should let you get back to your other friends. Don't forget, they need to know you're getting better, too. Rodney wouldn't even drink a birthday beer with me the other night he was so worried about you.'

Sheppard winced at that. In all the chaos that had ensued after their return to Atlantis, he'd completely forgotten about McKay's big day. 'Carson, I need one more favour,' he called at the after him. 'I need to go to my room.'

Carson spun, looking horrified at the suggestion. 'Your room? You might be feeling a wee bit better, son, but you're not ready for that yet.'

'I don't mean leave the infirmary...there's just something I need to get...something important. I'll even use a wheelchair.'

Carson didn't look to sure, but Sheppard applied the wounded puppy look that always worked on the nurses, and to his surprise and delight found it worked on Carson, too. 'All right, I'll ask Ronon to come and fetch one. You wait right here.'

'And can you occupy Rodney for a while? I want it to be a surprise.'

Carson smiled, finally grasping what he was up to. 'Aye I suppose I could ask him to go through the changes he made to the Ancient gene sequencer one more time. He never seems to tire of that.'

He headed out, leaving Sheppard alone again in the dimmed light of that observation room. Teyla was peaceful again, which made him feel better, but he knew he wouldn't feel right until she was back to her old self and cuddling Torren. Then, and only then, he might find a way to forgive himself.

oooOOOooo

Rodney had to wonder why a man as supposedly educated and intelligent as Carson had to have things explained to him so many times before he could grasp them. Admittedly, few people were blessed with his receptivity to new information, but Carson was supposedly an expert in genetics. This machine should have been right up his avenue.

He was halfway through his explanation again when the Scot suddenly announced, 'Oh, look at the time. I promised to meet Alison for lunch. Got to go.'

He slapped Rodney on the shoulder as he scooted out, practically knocking him over in his haste to leave. McKay wondered what had got into him, but really couldn't be bothered to try to work it out. People confused him at the pest of times. He just didn't get them.

'McKay.'

The sound of Sheppard calling his name completely surprised him, making him wheel round on his chair and almost tip off. 'Sheppard...what're you doing here? Shouldn't you be in the infirmary?'

'Your girlfriend let me out for a while as long as I promise not to overdo it,' Sheppard told him, shuffling in and pushing carefully up onto a seat.

Rodney noticed he had one hand behind his back, just as Jennifer had held hers the other night with the muffin. So what was he hiding? 'What can I do for you?'

'Nothing...just thought I'd see how you were...you know, with all the late nights you've been putting in.'

Rodney eyed him suspiciously. Late night weren't unusual for him. He rarely slept more than five hours in any given twenty-four hour period anyway. 'That's uncharacteristically concerned of you...'

'Well, I feel kinda responsible since you've mostly been working on the gene re-sequencer.'

'Well, the burdens of being the smartest...human in two galaxies are many. I wouldn't feel too bad about it; if it hadn't been you and your crumbling genetics something else would have gone wrong. Sometimes I think the universe just conspires to make sure I never get my eight hours.'

Sheppard smirked when he stumbled over his catchphrase, having to specify he was the smartest human now having met Maebus and her kind. He was still stinging over the shock of how much smarter than him they were, but knowing they were tens of thousands of years old certainly softened the blow.

'You know, you should learn to delegate more,' Sheppard sympathised, his face now solemn, although Rodney was pretty sure he could see a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. 'I mean, you have to make sure you get plenty of rest. A man of your age needs lots of sleep.'

'Oh, I see where this is going,' McKay sneered, folding his arms and glaring over them. 'Har har, very funny. Need I remind you that you hit forty over a year ago?'

'No, Rodney. You need not. My fortieth birthday is indelibly imprinted in my brain, thanks to that hormonal teenager on Bratala.'

'What is it with you and alien women, Sheppard?'

His friend shrugged, the picture of innocence. 'I have no idea what you mean.'

'Oh, yes you do. You turn on the charm and they're putty in your hands...even Maebus, an ancient and supposedly superior being couldn't resist 'the Sheppard effect'.'

'Good thing, too, or we'd still be in a Pendoran cell being 'augmented'.'

Rodney let out a huff. 'Speak for yourself. All I got was electric shocks. Apparently, I perform better under the threat of pain.'

'I'll remember that next time we need you to come up with a quick solution to a problem,' Sheppard quipped, making Rodney wish he hadn't told him. He hoped the twinkle in his eye meant he wouldn't have Ronon punch him whenever they were in a 'ticking clock' situation.

All this time Sheppard had kept his hand behind his back, and Rodney's curiosity finally got the better of him. 'So, are you gonna show me what you have behind your back or not?'

'Oh, that,' Sheppard said matter-of-fact, tossing something onto Rodney's workbench. 'Sorry it's late, but 'Happy Birthday!'

Rodney looked at the pristine copy of a Superman comic, issue 234 – the same one he'd gifted to Sheppard on his fortieth birthday. 'I...I don't...'

'Told you I'd let you have it back when you turned forty,' Sheppard reminded him.

'Yeah, yeah I know, but I didn't really expect you to do it.'

'And I've been looking after it,' Sheppard told him, dipping his head toward the pristine cellophane still covering it. 'You can't tell it's even been opened.'

'I...I can see that,' Rodney agreed. 'But I gave it to you as a gift.'

'I know...and I really appreciated it, Rodney. 'But I could see how much the thing meant to you when you handed it over, that's why I want you to have it back now...and I'll get you something else when I get chance; the whole getting kidnapped and imprisoned for three weeks kind of screwed up my plans.'

'No...Sheppard. You should keep the comic. I owe you that much after what you did to get us away from the Pendorans...' Rodney pushed the plastic-coated comic toward Sheppard again, but he didn't pick it up.

'I've got an idea. Why don't we agree to share it?' Sheppard suggested. 'You keep it until it's my birthday, then I get custody of it until it's your birthday again. It's not like I have the monopoly on saving our asses.' Now he reached out for the comic at last, but only to push it back in front of Rodney.

Touched by the gesture and his friend's words, Rodney nodded his agreement. 'Sounds good. Thanks, Sheppard.'

'And Rodney...stop worrying about being the smartest person around. Have some fun...live a little...you're as smart as you need to be. That's all that matters.'

'Yeah...you're right.' And he knew Sheppard was right and he should chill about the whole needing to be the smartest person around thing, but it wasn't that easy. Being smart had been his life's focus; letting it slide wasn't going to come easy.

Sheppard looked around the lab now. 'So where's Maebus. She's not working with you?'

'No, she's been working more with Carson and Jen for the past few days. They needed her expertise in manipulating genetics to help get Teyla back.'

Sheppard slipped carefully from his seat, straightening his back. He moved like an old man, seizing up whenever he sat still too long, one of the curses of being bed ridden and sick, Rodney supposed. 'You know,' Sheppard mused, tightening the belt on the robe he wore over his scrubs, 'she hasn't been to see me once since I woke up. I get the feeling she's avoiding me...'

'Well I think it's fair to say she's carrying a little guilt over everything her people did to us while we were on their ship. Maybe she thinks you wouldn't want to see her.'

'Yeah...maybe.' He started heading for the door. 'I might just see if I can find her –'

'Or not,' Jennifer interrupted, now standing in the doorway with her arms folded in mock annoyance. 'I told you it was okay to go to the observation room for a while and now I find you're off gallivanting around half of Atlantis. Back to the infirmary, Colonel. Doctor's orders.'

Sheppard peered back over his shoulder at Rodney. 'You should do as she says,' Rodney advised him with a smirk. 'She's not big on taking no for an answer.'

'You bet I'm not,' she teased Sheppard.

'But I feel fine –' Sheppard protested, and Rodney knew without even being able to see his friend's face that he was using those puppy dog eyes of his on her.

'That's because you've been resting,' she pointed out, planting her hands on her hips now. 'So are you coming back to the infirmary, or do I have to get a gurney?'

Sheppard held his hands up in surrender. 'No gurney. I'll come quietly!'

'Good,' Jen smirked, winking at Rodney. 'And if you're really good, I might just see if I can persuade Maebus to come to you.'

With a gentle but firm hand on Sheppard's back, she steered him from the lab. Rodney grinned to himself as he returned to his work, briefly picking up the comic book before setting it aside somewhere for safe keeping. It seemed there was one woman immune to Sheppard's charm, and she was all his. Maybe finding a way to focus on something other than being smart wouldn't be so hard with a woman like that at his side.

oooOOOooo

His little jaunt had exhausted Sheppard, and he'd drifted off to sleep almost as soon as his head had hit his pillow. But now he woke to the sight of Maebus' retreating back. The alien had clearly hoped to use his rest time as another excuse to avoid speaking to him, but he wasn't about to let her get away with that.

'Maebus,' he called out, watching her jerk to a halt. 'Nice of you to stop by.'

She turned around and gave him a feeble smile. He hadn't expected her to be wearing the Aviator shades she was now sporting, but he supposed she needed something to shield her from the bright Atlantis lights. Though the sight was comical, he made sure he didn't react in any way that would make her uncomfortable. 'I...I thought it best to leave you sleeping,' she explained.

'No, it's fine. I'm good,' he insisted, pushing himself up into a sitting position. 'Come and sit with me for a while.'

Maebus looked anxious, but did as he requested, taking up the seat beside his bed. She didn't meet his eyes.

'Maebus,' he began carefully, thinking his words through. 'What happened on your ship...all those experiments...they _were_ pretty unforgivable, but as far as I'm concerned you redeemed yourself the moment you chose to help us.'

Maebus remained hunched sat on that chair, even more so than Ronon did when he was sitting watch over him. But it was more than the inadequately sized chair that was making her uncomfortable, that much was clear. 'Maebus?'

'I cannot accept your forgiveness, Colonel. As you said, what we did was unforgivable. Helping you return to normal doesn't begin to erase the harm.'

Sheppard watched her, seeing genuine shame in her demeanour. There was more going on than she was saying, so he decided to call her on it.

'What made you decide to help us?' he asked.

She looked up at him, her eyes unreadable behind those sunglasses. 'You asked me to.'

He frowned. 'Are you saying no one has ever asked for your help before?'

'No.' The dark lenses of the shades stayed trained on him as she seemed to struggle with her emotions. 'I mean _you _asked me to. I could not refuse to help _you._'

'I don't get it,' he confessed. 'Why did I make such a difference?'

Maebus sighed, wringing her hands. 'My people have always prided themselves on their intelligence, on their superiority. We have long made the pursuit of new knowledge our priority. But we have only ever tested and catalogued beings that were...' she paused, stumbling over the next words, 'less than us.'

Though that phrase made him prickle with annoyance, he urged her to continue. 'Go on.'

'But the experiments we carried out on you brought forth something incredible...something wonderful, something that when it reached it's full potential was going to be far greater than we could ever hope to be. We have strived for immortality through cloning and consciousness transferral. You...' she paused again as her voice cracked. She swallowed deeply, composing herself. 'You would have become truly immortal, a being of pure energy, a being with the strength to save life or destroy it with a single thought. How could I not respond to your request?'

He stayed silent, moved by her obvious distress. His abilities had clearly shaken beliefs she'd held precious for thousands of years, mainly the belief that her kind were superior to everyone else.

'We should have stopped,' she almost whispered now. 'But we were so arrogant we believed we had the right to continue because we had assisted you on your way to Ascension. We didn't have that right.'

'You didn't have the right to hurt any of us,' Sheppard pointed out. 'Or any of the other beings you've tested. Intelligence isn't just about knowing things other people don't. True intelligence is a whole heap of things; understanding, compassion, knowledge, awareness of self and others...I could go on but I think you get the picture.'

She nodded, turning her gaze to her entwined hands.

'Your people have a long way to go before you understand what it is to be intelligent.'

'I know,' she said quietly. 'Which is why I have decided to return to them.'

Sheppard blinked at her, wondering if he'd heard her correctly. 'Y...you're going back to them?'

She nodded, still not looking his way.

'Won't you be in trouble?'

'Yes...but it is something I have to do.'

'No, you don't,' he told her. 'Look, maybe you haven't gotten the warmest welcome here so far, but people will come round. And I know we could find a place for you either in Rodney's team or in the infirmary...'

She shook her head and he stopped talking, chewing his lip.

'I have made my choice, Colonel,' she told him, giving him another weak smile. 'On the scout ship, and even before that, on the mothership, you showed me what it was to be intelligent. You allowed yourself to be grievously wounded in the laboratory, even risked death to save the people you care about. Now it is time for me to take a risk. My people will never understand what they are doing wrong unless someone they consider equal points it out to them. Even then it is unlikely...but I must try.'

'And if they won't listen?'

She sighed and pinned on another of those half-smiles. 'I will spend my life imprisoned and when this body fails I will not be granted a new one.'

'You'll die?'

'Just as I would if I stayed here. It has happened to many beings through the millennia. I have had a long life, Colonel Sheppard, and I am not afraid of death. My only regret would be to die without seeing a change in my people, and if I do not try to return to them, there is no hope of that ever happening.'

He understood her sentiment, but his own natural built-in sense of guilt, the guilt that had pulled him back from the brink of Ascension, made him want to change her mind. 'But what if they've moved on? You could spend the rest of your life looking for them and never find them.'

'That is the sacrifice I am willing to make.' She looked his way again. 'It will help me on the road to discovering true intelligence.'

She straightened up now and for the first time he could see some sense of pride returning to her. His forgiveness wasn't what she needed. She had to rectify the Pendorans whole way of life to be able to live with what she'd done.

Realising that convincing her to change her mind was never going to work, he nodded, then extended his hand. 'Thank you for saving us, Maebus. It's been an honour.'

It took a while for her to accept the gesture, then she took his hand in hers so tentatively he could barely feel her touch. So he gripped on tight and shook her over-sized hand to show he wasn't disgusted by or afraid of her. Her grip tightened in response, and she said, 'No colonel, it is I who am honoured.'

Then she rose from her seat and left without another word, but at some level, maybe just the human level he'd always been capable of, Sheppard felt the mixture of pain and satisfaction burning in her. He was glad they'd had a chance to talk and hoped their conversation might bring some small comfort to her in the possibly long journey back to her people.

oooOOOooo

BDUs had never felt so good. In a way, they were as much a part of his identity as his unruly black locks and his pale hazel-green eyes, and having them back helped him to feel...normal, although he was still officially a week's worth of treatments away from that.

After almost two weeks wearing nothing but hospital scrubs Sheppard had finally been declared fit to be released, but not for duty. He didn't mind that; he knew in his heart he wasn't quite ready for that yet. There were still other things he needed to get sorted out first, one of them being the woman lying in the bed in the isolation room he was currently looking down into.

Today, Teyla appeared relaxed as she chatted with the nurse checking her vitals, and she even ate the food they'd brought for her with more gusto than before. She was on the mend, and that was the biggest relief of all.

The door to his room opened and Jennifer walked in. 'Thought you might be here, Colonel. How's your first day of freedom treating you?' A second later her face dropped as she realised how poor her choice of words had been. 'Oh...God...I'm sorry, that was a really bad joke...'

'Forget it,' he told her. It wasn't like his time with the Pendorans had been his first incarceration. Her words didn't offend him at all. 'How's Teyla doing?'

'Really well,' she nodded, clearly thankful for the change of subject. 'She's responding to the treatments better than I could have hoped...you can see the change for yourself.

'Yeah...she looks great.'

'Another week or so and, just like you, she'll be good as new.'

That was music to his ears. As he'd hauled her mutated form through the corridors of that Pendoran mothership it had been hard to believe she could ever be herself again. But he'd been determined to give her that chance, and thankfully it had paid off.

'You wanna go talk to her?' He turned Jennifer's way, seeing her face split by a huge smile. 'She's allowed visitors today, and I figured you might like to be the first.'

'That would be great—'

'Don't stay too long, though. She's happy and calm today, but still kinda weak. I don't want her overtaxed.'

'Five minutes...I promise.'

'I'm gonna hold you to that,' she smirked. 'Come on.'

He followed her down to the isolation room, where two marines remained posted at the door, just as they no doubt had the whole time since their return. They both stood to attention at Sheppard's approach, but he told them to relax. He wasn't even on back on active duty yet, so he saw no need for formality.

Keller opened the door and announced to Teyla that she had a visitor, then pulled back to allow him to pass. He stepped carefully into the room, at some level half-expecting her to react badly to his presence. 'Hi, Teyla.'

Her actual response was quite the opposite. 'John! It is good to see you!'

She held out a hand to him and he crossed the room to take it in his, sitting down in the chair beside her. 'You look well,' she told him.

'So do you,' he replied, but her expression changed to one of doubt as her eyes drifted along the length of her pale and veined arm.

'Thank you, but I know that is not true. I am still too Wraith-like for that to be the case.'

He covered the hand he gripped with his free hand and looked earnestly into her eyes. 'Trust me, Teyla. After seeing what those people did to you, you look fantastic.' Then embarrassed by his outpouring, he took that hand away again, although Teyla wouldn't relinquish her grip on the other.

'I do not remember everything about my time aboard that ship, but I recall the comfort you tried to offer me in the darkest moments of my transformation. I was glad you were there.'

'I didn't do anything...'

'You were there for me...I could not have expected anything more of you.'

He wanted to look up, but he could feel her gaze burning into him and the intensity of her emotions was too much to face.

'I should've gotten you out of there sooner,' he muttered, rubbing her fingers with his thumb.

'There was nothing more you could have done.'

He could hear the quaver in her voice, and once again shied away from meeting her gaze. He wished he was better at this kind of thing.

'Dr Keller tells me you did some remarkable things to get us free of the Pendorans,' Teyla continued, unfazed by his lack of response.

He lifted his eyes to hers at last, seeing the gratitude there. 'I did what I had to do. Every one of you would have done the same.'

'You almost died...I am not certain I could have gone through with that now...'

He knew she was thinking of Torren, and in this environment, safe and with plenty of time to ponder, it was easy for doubts to creep in. But Sheppard had no doubts about Teyla. She had always and would always be willing to give up her life for the rest of them when the situation called for it. He just hoped he could always prevent her from having to do that.

'Those marks...did I cause them?'

'No,' he instantly responded, feeling self-conscious, He'd forgotten all about the scars of his face, but even though they were now well on the way to healing they were obviously still visible. 'Nothing that happened on that ship was your fault, Teyla. It was all down to the Pendorans.'

'Perhaps you would do well to remember that yourself,' she said with a gentle smile. 'You have nothing to feel guilty for, John.'

Guilt.

Maybe Teyla was right, but guilt had been the thing that had pulled him back from the brink of Ascension and he wasn't ready to let go of it just yet. Having it made him feel alive, and at some level he was afraid if he let go of it he might lose what it was to be him again. He gave her a smile he hoped she took as agreement and left it at that.

Teyla sat forward then, tugging a little on his hand to encourage him to do the same. They pressed their foreheads together in the traditional Athosian friendship greeting and just for a second he thought he could read her feelings again; relief, gratitude and affection, pure Teyla through and though.

When they separated, they sat a while in silence, content in each other's company until Jennifer arrived to tell him his time was up.

He left without argument, though Teyla was initially a little reluctant to let go of his hand, as if his departure might somehow make her recovery less real. He figured she wouldn't feel completely happy until she was reunited with her son. Friends were one thing, but the connection between a mother and child – that was something else entirely, something the Pendorans could never hope to understand. Perhaps cloning was the cause of their lack of empathy for other species. If so, he hoped human beings never became as advanced as they were.

oooOOOooo

Four days later, Maebus finally felt she had done all she could and readied herself to leave. Sheppard made sure the best of Rodney's team were available to help her prepare her craft, and that she had whatever food supplies would fit with her unusual metabolism. She needed a diet high in protein to keep the tissues of her cloned body healthy and renewing as a normal body should, a side affect of the process, so they packed her off with an assortment of unprocessed meat and dairy produce to start her on her way.

As her craft carefully lowered into the gate room, a far tighter fit than their own puddle jumpers, she held her hand up to acknowledge Sheppard and his team, who stood at the bottom of the main staircase to wave her off. She had asked them not to follow her to her craft, preferring to run through pre-flight checks alone. So they had honoured her wishes, though Sheppard suspected it was more to do with wishing to hide her emotions from them than needing to concentrate as she's suggested.

They returned the gesture, sad to see her leave. Maebus had been a great help in the two and a half weeks she'd spent with them, assisting with more than just Teyla and Sheppard's recovery, but also expanding the science team's understanding of previously incomprehensible astrophysics theories. She would be sorely missed, even if Rodney did look relieved to send her on her way.

As the ship shot forward through the now active 'gate to a Spacegate on the edge of the Pegasus Galaxy, Rodney rubbed his hands together with a smile. 'So, who's up for lunch?'

Sheppard raised his eyebrows. 'Wow, Rodney, you don't have to be so broken up about Maebus leaving...'

'Don't get me wrong, I'm sorry she's gone, but she was pretty determined to get back to her people. There was nothing any of us could say to stop her, and yes, before you ask, I did try.'

'I think she is very brave to return in the hopes of affecting change,' Teyla said wistfully. 'Altering the beliefs of such an ancient people will not be an easy task.'

'You're telling me,' Sheppard replied, giving Rodney a sideways glance. 'She has a whole race of beings with egos bigger than Rodney's to contend with. I don't envy her that.'

'Hey!'

Teyla slapped Sheppard's arm, although she was clearly amused. Ronon just grinned.

'Anyway, the way I see it, you're the one to blame for her bout of heroics. You went all 'super-powered' and now she's realised her whole life has been one huge mistake.'

Sheppard shrugged it off, although he had been thinking the same thing himself. 'Well, at least some good came out of our suffering. If my transformation helps her make her people see the error of their ways then it did some good. With great power comes great responsibility, after all.'

'Very true,' Teyla nodded. 'It is good that something positive came out of what was done to you.'

Rodney just squinted at him. 'Seriously? You're quoting Spiderman at a time like this.'

Sheppard shrugged. 'It seemed appropriate.'

'Who's Spiderman?' Ronon asked.

'I believe his is a cartoon character,' Teyla explained.

'Comic book hero,' McKay and Sheppard corrected in unison.

'There is a difference?' she asked innocently.

'Yeah, a big difference,' Rodney insisted as they began to mount the staircase to head for the mess hall.

'So,' Sheppard said casually as they walked. 'Dr Keller says I'm okay to take a quick flight as long as I'm accompanied by someone else who can fly.'

He looked over at McKay, who pointed at himself as if having trouble believing Sheppard was referring to him. 'Well, I guess you could call that lurching about in a jumper I do flying.'

'I wouldn't,' Ronon quipped, ignoring the murderous look McKay shot him.

'I was thinking about a short trip – maybe a visit to New Athos,' Sheppard continued, seeing Teyla's head immediately snap around in his direction.

'New Athos?'

'Yeah,' he drawled, fighting back a smile. 'I hear there's a couple of guys out there pretty keen to see a certain member of my team.'

Teyla's eyes teared up, but then she shook her head. 'No, I must not go to Torren yet. I do not want him to be afraid of me.'

John caught her arm and stopped her right their on the stairs. 'Hey, you may still be a little pale, but this is nothing that would scare your little boy.'

'But I am not myself yet!'

'Yes you are, Teyla,' he assured her. 'Look, I may not be a parent, but I do remember what it was like being a kid, and I know that no matter how sick my mom looked, I would have wanted to see her anyway. Love like that is unconditional. He'll just be glad to have his mom back.'

'He's right,' Ronon grunted. 'I'd wanna see you if you were my mom.'

She still looked unconvinced. 'Perhaps.'

'Tell her I'm right, McKay,' Sheppard begged, urging the scientist to add his weight to the argument.

'Well, I'm not sure I'm the best person to ask about that,' Rodney confessed, rubbing the back of his neck. 'I spent most of my childhood in boarding schools so my mother was a virtual stranger to me. You know, a couple of times she came to pick me up for the summer vacation and almost ended up taking another kid home because she didn't recognise me.'

'You're really going to offload this on us now?' Sheppard asked, throwing him a pained look.

'Er...no...no...I don't suppose this is the right time,' Rodney confessed. 'Although if there ever is a right time for that kind of thing I'm yet to find it.'

'I think your mom had the right idea,' Ronon grumbled, setting off again for the mess hall.

'Well thank you for your support, Conan!' McKay squeaked after him, looking crest-fallen.

Teyla took hold of his arm and began to mount the stairs again with him. 'Do not listen to them, Rodney. I for one am glad you shared your story. You have convinced me I shouldn't waste another moment that I could be spending with my son.'

Sheppard watched them go, allowing himself a small smile. Though it would take a while for all of them to feel completely normal again, they were on their way, and reuniting Teyla with Torren would be an important part of that process.

He turned one last time to glance at the now inactive gate, thinking once again of Maebus and the mammoth task ahead of her. A part of him doubted she would even find her people, let alone be able to convince them to change their habits, but he seriously hoped he was wrong. Maybe one day they'd stumble across the Pendorans again and find them sharing their knowledge with less advanced races rather than inflicting it on them. It was a stretch, but he was ever the optimist.

If they didn't change, he hoped to whatever powers were up there that their paths never crossed again. Because next time, if they pushed him to the edge of Ascension again, he wouldn't be so lenient.

**The End**

**A/N: So there you have it. The final part ended up ridiculously long even though I split it yesterday! Anyway, thanks for your patience and I hope you enjoyed the story. If you've followed it through to this point, please take the time to let me know what you think. Reviews really are appreciated. **


End file.
